笑话哦
很搞笑的冷笑话哦 !

讲故事或笑话英语(讲故事或笑话英语翻译)

本文目录一览:

求英语故事或笑话

英语笑话(一)

Q:

What's

the

difference

between

a

monkey

and

a

flea?

A:

A

monkey

can

have

fleas,

but

a

flea

can't

have

monkeys.

猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢?你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。但除此之外呢,那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤,而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。这个答案很有意思吧?

Q:

How

can

you

most

irritate

a

farmer?

A:

By

treading

on

his

corn?

如果你踩了农夫的玉米或是谷物,他肯定会生气的;而如果你踩了农夫脚底的鸡眼,他会更生气。Corn既可以表示“玉米/谷物”,也有“鸡眼”的意思。

Q:

Which

is

the

strongest

creature

in

the

world?

A:

The

snail.

It

carries

its

house

on

its

back.

因为snail(蜗牛)的后背上总是背着一所房子,所以说蜗牛是世界上最强壮的生物是不足为奇的。你说呢?

Q:

What

do

people

do

in

a

clock

factory?

A:

They

make

faces

all

day.

一看到make

faces这个短语,你可千万别以为是在钟表厂工作的人整天都做鬼脸呀!因为除了这个意思以外,它还可以从字面上解释为制造钟面。

Q:

How

do

you

stop

a

sleepwalker

from

walking

in

his

sleep?

A:

Keep

him

awake.

怎样才能不让梦游者(sleepwalker)梦游(walk

in

his

sleep)呢?最简单的方法就是不让他睡觉。虽然这不是治疗方法,但如果让梦游者醒着呢,他的确就不会去梦游了。

讲故事或笑话英语(讲故事或笑话英语翻译)插图

英语幽默小故事7篇

若是你在 学习英语 的过程中感到很枯燥,不妨来读一些英语幽默小 故事 放松放松。英语幽默故事简短,内容诙谐幽默,情节生动有趣,相信在你在阅读的同时也可以一起学习英语哦。这次我给大家整理了英语幽默小故事,供大家阅读参考。

更多故事相关内容推荐↓↓↓

名人实现梦想的故事

简短励志的小故事

感动人心的故事

三分钟成语故事演讲

名人读书的故事

英语幽默小故事1

My husband,Michael,a bus driver,was passing a deserted bus stop when one of his passengers called out that a woman wanted to get on. He pulled up to the curb and opened the doors.

我丈夫,麦克是个开大巴士的。一次当他刚要开过一个无人上下车的车站时,一位乘客喊过有位老妇人要上车。麦克把车停靠在马路边,打开了车门。

After a minute,Michael saw an elderly woman with a cane crossing the street slowly.

过了足有一分钟,麦克才见到一位老太太拄着拐杖,慢腾腾地过着马路朝车子走来。

He waited patiently as she made her way to the bus and climbed the steps.

麦克衬心地等她来到汽车旁上着台阶。While she was looking in her purse for her bus pass,he began to close the doors.”Wait a minute!”she snapped."My mother's coming.”

趁老太太打开钱包找月票的工夫,麦克欲关门,老妇人阻止道:“等一会,我妈妈还在后面呢!”

英语幽默小故事2

Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head and whispered," To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago."

Bernie应邀来到他的朋友Morris家吃晚餐。在朋友家,Bernie发现,不管问他老婆什么问题,Morris总要在每句话的前面加上一些亲密的称呼,象蜜糖,我的爱人,亲爱的,甜心等等。Bernie对Morris说,“你们夫妻俩真够亲密的,结婚这么多年了,你还叫她叫得那么亲密。”Morris低下头,小声地对Bernie说,“老实跟你说吧,三年前我忘记老婆的真名是什么了。”

英语幽默小故事3

Two guys were walking through the jungle. All of a sudden, a tiger appears from a distance, running towards them. One of the guys takes out a pair of "Nikes" from his bag and starts to put them on. The other guy with a surprised look and exclaims, "Do you think you will run faster than the tiger with those?" His friend replies: "I don't have to out run it, I just have to run faster than you."

两个男人正在穿过丛林,突然,一只老虎出现在远处,向他们冲来。 其中的一个人从包里拿出一双“耐克”鞋,开始穿上。另一个人惊奇地看着他说,“你以为穿上这个就可以跑得过老虎吗?” 他的朋友回答道:“我不用跑得过它,我只要跑得比你快就行了。”

英语幽默小故事4

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.

一个女孩去 拜访 她的金发朋友,这个朋友最近养了两只“狗”,于是女孩问道:“它们叫什么名字呀?”

The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.

金发朋友说,一只叫Rolex,另一只叫Timex。

Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?

女孩说:“哪有狗狗叫这个名字的。”

"HELLLOOOOOOO..." answered the blonde. "They're watch dogs!"

“那个……”金发朋友说。“他们是监视器!”

英语幽默小故事5

Too Much Pressure

For a couple years I’ve been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my job,but now I found out the real reason:I’m tired because I’m overworked.The population of this country is 237 million.104 million are retired.That leaves 133 million to do the work.There are 85 million in school,which leaves 48 million to do the work.Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government,leaving 19 million to do the work.2.8 million are in the Armed Forces,which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.Take from the total the 14.8 million people who work for State and City Governments and that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals,leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.Now,there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.That leaves just two people to do the work.You and me.And you’re sitting at the table reading jokes.

压力太大

多年以来我一直感到很疲惫,我曾经把原因归咎为缺乏睡眠以及来自于工作上的巨大压力。但是,我现在找到了真正的原因:我感到疲倦是因为我超负荷工作。我们这个国家有2.37亿人口。其中1.04亿已经退休了。还剩下1.33亿在工作。有8,500万人还在上学,工作的就剩下4,800万。这其中还有2,900万联邦政府雇员,真正做事的就剩1,900万人,又有280万人在服兵役,就剩下1,620万人在工作。从中再去掉各州和市政府的雇员1,480万人,还剩下140万人工作。但又有18.8万人生病住院,现在只剩下121.2万人工作。其中1,211,998人在坐牢。这样仅剩下两个人在工作,就是你和我。而你却坐在桌边看笑话。

英语幽默小故事6

Top 9 Reasons to Study Economics

Economists are armed and dangerous: "Watch out for our invisible hands."

Economists can supply it on demand .

You can talk about money without ever having to make any.

You get to say "trickle down" with a straight face .

Mick Jagger and Arnold Schwarzenegger both studied economics and look how they turned out .

When you are in the unemployment line, at least you will know why you are there.

If you rearrange the letters in "ECONOMICS", you get "COMIC NOSE".

Although ethics teaches that virtue is its own reward , in economics we get taught that reward is its own virtue.

When you get drunk, you can tell everyone that you are just researching the law of diminishing marginal utility.

学习经济学的九大理由

经济学家们会武功:“小心我们的无影手。”

经济学家们能够做到有求必应。

你可以不必挣钱而对金钱夸夸其谈。

你可以开始拉着脸说“涓滴”这一术语了。

米克·贾格尔和阿诺德·施瓦辛格两人都学过经济学,看看他们后来都成为了什么样的人物。

站在失业队伍里的时候,至少你会知道自己为什么失业。

假如重新安排“经济学”这个词包含的字母,你得到的是“小丑的鼻子”。

伦理学教导我们坚守德行本身即是回报,在经济学中我们得到的教导则是获得回报本身即是德行。

喝醉了的时候,你可以告诉所有人你只是在体验边际效用递减规律而已。

英语幽默小故事7

Nobel Prize in Economics

Economics is the only field in which two people can get a Nobel Prize for saying exactly the opposite thing.

Or Economics is the only field in which two people can share a Nobel Prize for saying opposing things. Specifically, Myrdal and Hayek shared one.

(A rumor has it that there was a similar case in neuroscience, Golgi and Cajal, maybe economists are not so different!)

诺贝尔经济学奖

两个持完全不同观点的人都能够获得诺贝尔奖,这种情况只有在经济学领域才会发生。

或者两个持完全不同观点的人能够分享诺贝尔奖,这种情况也只有在经济学领域才会发生。具体而言,缪尔达尔和哈耶克就是如此。

(有传言称在神经科学领域也有类似情形,比如戈尔吉和卡哈尔,所以经济学家也许并非那么另类。)

英语幽默小故事相关 文章 :

★ 英语幽默小故事合集7篇

★ 英语幽默小故事合集5篇

★ 幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的

★ 简短的英语幽默小故事

★ 幽默英语小故事

★ 英语故事带故事大全(带翻译)

★ 英语趣味幽默小故事

★ 英语幽默故事小短文

★ 幽默小故事英语

★ 英语小笑话小故事短篇

var _hmt = _hmt || []; (function() { var hm = document.createElement("script"); hm.src = ""; var s = document.getElementsByTagName("script")[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(hm, s); })();

笑话英语小故事

下面是我整理的笑话英语小 故事 ,希望对大家有帮助。

笑话英语小故事:We are friends(我们是朋友)

Tommy is turtle. He has no daddy, no mummy and no friends.

Tommy 是一只乌龟。他没有爸爸、妈妈和朋友。

He is crying. A bird comes. She says: “I can fly. Let’s fly!”

他在哭。一只小鸟过来了。她说:“我会飞,让我们一起飞吧。”

Tommy says: “ no,no, I can’t fly!”

Tommy 说:“不,不,我不会飞。”

A rabbit comes. He says: “ I can jump. Let’s jump!”

一只兔子过来了。他说:“我会跳。让我们一起跳吧。”

Tommy says: “no, no. I can’t jump!”

Tommy说:“不,不。我不会跳。”

A monkey comes. He says:“I can climb the tree. Let’s climb the tree!”

一只猴子过来了。他说:“我会爬树。让我们一起爬树吧。”

Tommy says: “ no, no. I can’t climb the tree!”

Tommy说:“不,不。我不会爬树。”

A duck comes. He says: “I can swim. Let’s swim!”

一只鸭子过来了。他说:“我会 游泳 ,让我们一起游泳吧!”

Tommy smiles: “ we are friends!”

鸭子笑了:“我们是朋友!”

笑话英语小故事:Little mouse(小老鼠)

It’s a sunny day. A little mouse wants to go out and play.

这是一个晴朗的一天。一只小老鼠想要去外面玩

But he is afraid of the cat . so he peeks and peeks.

但是它害怕猫。 所以左看看右看看

He peeks to the left and peeks to the right.

它看了左边又看右边

Suddenly, the mummy mouse shouts.

突然,老鼠妈妈叫道:

“watch out! Watch out! The cat is here , the cat is here.”

“小心!小心! 猫在这里,猫在这里”

笑话英语小故事:The hart in the ox-stall

A hart was being pursued by some dogs. It ran into an ox-stall, and hid itself in a truss of hay. Only the tips of its horns could be seen.

Soon after the hunters came to the stable, and asked if anyone had seen the hart. The stable boys looked around, but could see nothing. So the hunters went away.

Later the master came in. He looked around, and saw that something unusual was there.

He pointed to the truss of hay, and asked, "What are those two strange things?" When the stable boys went to look, they discovered the hart.

牛栏里的雄鹿

●一只雄鹿被猎狗追赶得很急,跑进牛栏里,躲在一大堆干草里面,只有鹿角尖露在外面。

●猎人们很快来到牛栏,询问是否有人看到这头鹿。牧童们四处张望,什么也没有看到,于是猎人们走了。

●不久,主人回来了,他四处检查时,觉得有些异常。

●他指着那堆干草问:“那两个怪模怪样的东西是什么?”牧童们上前来翻寻,发现了那只鹿。

寓意: 在逃避一种危险时,不要忽视另一种危险。

笑话英语小故事:The eagle and the arrow

An eagle was flying in the sky. As soon as it saw a rabbit, it swooped down on its prey.

Suddenly it was hit by an arrow.

It fluttered slowly down to the earth, and blood was pouring from the wound.

When the eagle looked down, he found that the shaft of the arrow was feathered with one of its own plumes.“Alas!”it cried.“We often give our enemies the means for our own destruction.”

鹰和箭

●鹰在天空中飞翔,当他看见一只野兔时,就俯冲下来捕捉猎物。

●突然,有人一箭射中了它。

●鹰扇着翅膀降落在地面上。鲜血从伤口中喷涌而出。

●它低头看到箭尾竟是由一根它自己的羽毛制成的,就痛苦地说:“唉,我们总是给敌人提供毁灭我们自己的工具!”

寓意: 人们常常因自己的原因而受到伤害,那种痛苦更令人难受。

1分钟的英语小故事或小笑话?

第一则:心目中的英雄Personal Hero

Our granddaughter's second-grade class was asked to write about their personal heroes. Her father was flattered to find out that she had chosen him. "Why did you pick me?" he asked.

"Because I couldn't spell Arnold Schwarzenegger," she said.

我们的孙女儿读二年级,老师要求班上的同学写他们心目中的英雄。她的爸爸发现她选择了他,真是受宠若惊。“你为什么选我呢?”他问。

“因为我不会拼阿诺得.施瓦辛格(Arnold Schwarzenegger),“她说。

第二则:一个数学问题A Problem in Arithmetic

Bill is a good student and an intelligent boy. He likes to study arithmetic, and he can do all of the arithmetic problems in his book easily.

One day on his way to school Bill passed a fruit store. There was a sign in the window which said, "Apple-Six for five cents." An idea came to Bill and he went into the store.

"How much are the apples?" he asked the store.

"Six for five cents."

"But I don't want six apples."

"How many apples do you want?"

"It is not a question of how many apples I want. It is a problem in arithmetic."

"What do you mean by a problem in arithmetic?" asked the man.

"Well, if six apples are wroth five cents, then five apples are worth four cents, four apples are worth three cents, three apples are worth rwo cents, two apples are worth one cent and one apple is worth nothing. I only want one apple, and if one apple is worth nothing then it is not necessary for me to pay you."

Bill picked out a good apple, began to eat it, and walked happily out of the store. The man looked at the young boy with such surprise that he could not say a word.

比尔是一个好学生,也是个聪明的孩子。他喜欢学数学,课本上所有的数学问题他都能不费劲地解答。

有一天,在上学路上,比尔经过一家水果店。该店窗户上有个招牌上写着:“苹果--五美分六个。”比尔脑筋一转,进了店门。

“苹果怎么卖?”

“五美分六个。”

“但我不想要六个。”

“你想要几个?”

“这不是我想要几个的问题。这是个数学问题。”

“数学问题?你说这话是什么意思?”

“你看,如果六个苹果五美分,那么五个苹果四美分,四个苹果三美分,三个苹果二美分,二个苹果一美分,一个苹果就不要钱。我只要一个苹果,如果一个苹果一分钱也不要的话,那我也就没必要给你钱了。”

比尔拣了一个好苹果,开始吃了起来,然后兴高采烈地迈出了店门。那个售货员吃惊地望着这个小男孩,一句话也说不出来。

英语笑话或短故事

英语笑话(一)

q:

what's

the

difference

between

a

monkey

and

a

flea?

a:

a

monkey

can

have

fleas,

but

a

flea

can't

have

monkeys.

猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢?你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。但除此之外呢,那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤,而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。这个答案很有意思吧?

q:

how

can

you

most

irritate

a

farmer?

a:

by

treading

on

his

corn?

如果你踩了农夫的玉米或是谷物,他肯定会生气的;而如果你踩了农夫脚底的鸡眼,他会更生气。corn既可以表示“玉米/谷物”,也有“鸡眼”的意思。

q:

which

is

the

strongest

creature

in

the

world?

a:

the

snail.

it

carries

its

house

on

its

back.

因为snail(蜗牛)的后背上总是背着一所房子,所以说蜗牛是世界上最强壮的生物是不足为奇的。你说呢?

q:

what

do

people

do

in

a

clock

factory?

a:

they

make

faces

all

day.

一看到make

faces这个短语,你可千万别以为是在钟表厂工作的人整天都做鬼脸呀!因为除了这个意思以外,它还可以从字面上解释为制造钟面。

q:

how

do

you

stop

a

sleepwalker

from

walking

in

his

sleep?

a:

keep

him

awake.

怎样才能不让梦游者(sleepwalker)梦游(walk

in

his

sleep)呢?最简单的方法就是不让他睡觉。虽然这不是治疗方法,但如果让梦游者醒着呢,他的确就不会去梦游了。

赞(0)
未经允许不得转载:笑话哦 » 讲故事或笑话英语(讲故事或笑话英语翻译)

评论 抢沙发