笑话哦本文目录一览：
- 1、英语笑话带翻译短一些
- 2、英文短笑话
- 3、英语小笑话，越短越好，带翻译
英语笑话带翻译短一些
1. 英语笑话
英语笑话 【急！求英语笑话带翻译的,三到五分钟,两个人对话的,初二水平,
1、周而复始老王在树下休息，老李走过来对他说：“嗨，为什么不去上山砍柴？” 老王说：“砍柴干什么？” 老李说：“好卖钱啊.卖到钱就可以买驴，再沿家挨户卖柴.挣了钱就再 买卡车，然后买木厂卖木 器，再买更多的卡车，那样就可以发大财了.” 老王问：“发了财干什么？” 老李答：“发了财就可 以逍遥自在地享清福嘛.” 老王说：“那你以为我现在在干什么？”1,round and roundLao wang rested under the tree,Lao li came up and said,"hey,why not go up the hill cutting wood?" Pharaoh said:"cut wood stem what?" Lao li said:"good money!Sold into money can buy a donkey,then along home door-to-door selling wood.Zheng money will buy trucks,and then buy wood factory sells wooden ware,buy more trucks,so that you can be really rich." The old king:"fortune"?Lao li answer:"fortune can be to free and unfettered freely do well." Pharaoh said,"that you think I doing now?"2、甲鱼风波甲鱼又叫团鱼或鳖，俗称王八.味鲜美，价昂贵.“吃的不买，买的不吃”，实乃高级礼品，公关丑 星.某乡派数人携众鳖入城进贡.因其重量不同，又须按“职”分配，为免差错计，故将官 号写于纸上，贴于鳖背.……至机关干部住宅楼前，天已晚.不料竹篓倾覆，众甲鱼乘暮色争相逃命，乡人一片 惊呼：“赵局长”跑啦！——那个块头最大的.快抓住“钱处长”——小心它咬手.那墙角里黑乎乎的，莫非是“孙科长”？“李秘书”个头小，爬得快，怕是找不到了.2,turtle stormTurtle and call TuanYu or turtle,monly known as the tortoise.Taste delicious,the price is expensive."Eat not to buy,buy the do not eat",solid senior ts,pr ugly stars.MouXiang sent several people join the turtle into town tribute.Because of its different weights,and must according to "responsibility" distribution,in order to avoid mistakes plan,therefore,JiangGuan written in paper,stick at turtle's back。
.To government cadres residential against the building,it is late.Behold,all the turtle piggy overthrown by the dusk scramble to flee for life,XiangRen a exclaimed,"zhao chief" run!The bigger the biggest.- Catch "money director" - be careful it bites the hand.The corner of the mariposa rushed,murphy is "Samson section chief"?"Secretary li"'s *** aller,climb quickly,afraid that I can't find it.3、迟了在地铁里，一位男子发现扒手正在掏他的钱包，便幽默地说：“老兄，你来晚了！我今天虽然领 了薪水，但我太太下手比你快 多了！”3,lateIn the subway,a man found pickpocket is cutting his wallet,and humorously said:"man,you came to night!I today although took salary,but my wife lay more quickly than you!"4、情书小伙子在给女朋友的信中写到：“爱你爱得如此之深，以至愿为你赴汤蹈火.星期六如不下雨，我一定来.4,love letterGuy in the letters to his girlfriend wrote:"love your love so much,that would like to give you go through hell.On Saturday as it does not rain,I'll e.5、无理抱怨两个人一起吃饭，只有两条鱼，一大一小.一位先把大 的吃了，另一位勃然大怒.”多不合适！”他抱怨说.”怎 么了？”另一位问.”你吃掉了那条大的，如果我是你就不 会这样做.””你会怎 样呢？””我当然是先吃小的.”” 那好哇，你抱怨什么，那条小鱼不是还在那里吗！”5 and irrational plainTwo people eat together,only two fish,a great and a *** all.A first big eat,another flew into a rage."Not more suitable!" He plains."How yao?" Another asked."You ate that big,if I were you,I would not do so." "How would you like?" "Of course I is first eat *** all." "That good,you plained,the fish is still there!"6、为您保密甲：”这件事我只告诉你一人，请你千万为我保密." 乙：”放心，不但我要为你保密，我还要告诉大家都来为你保密.”6,for your confidentialA:"this matter I just tell you one person,you must the secret for me." B:"trust,not only I want secret for you,I will tell everybody to be secret for you."7、擦玻璃父亲走进儿子的房间，夸奖道：干得好，儿子！窗户又干净又明亮，你是用肥皂水擦的吗？儿子：没有，爸爸，我用的是锤子.7,wipe glassFather entered the son's room,praise,way:well done,son!The window and clean and bright,you are using soap water wipe?Son:no,dad,I am using a sledgehammer.8、开学小学开学了，刚满6岁的冬冬不肯到学校上学.妈妈向冬冬解释，小朋友满6岁就要去上学，一直到15岁.最后冬冬终于在书桌前坐下来，满含热泪地问：等我15岁的时候，您会记得来接我吗？8,openingElementary school begins,just over 6 years old of winter winter will not e to school.Mother to dongdong explanation,children with 6 years old shall go to school,until 15 years old.Last winter winter finally before desk sat down and full of tears to ask:when I was 15,you will remember pick me up?。
英语小笑话带翻译15至25字
He Won Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 他赢了 汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？ 约翰尼：他害病卧床了。
他受了伤。 汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？ 约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 他的耳朵在我衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？” “一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。 “他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。
“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。” A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy." 好孩子 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？” “我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。
“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？” “她是个卖糖果的。”
Drunk One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman！" 醉酒 一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。
他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。”
“可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！” Hospitality The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor *** iled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy. 好客 由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。
过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。
你在哪里找到的奶酪？” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。
英语小笑话 上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球， 一个老美看到就笑我说， "Do you know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著 性， 缩写正好是 Adidas） " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快， 联想力这么丰富时，旁边的 一个老美帮我解围， 他说， 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn， 他们的招牌歌之一就是 A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢，这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟 能详的喔！ 下次就换你去取笑老美了 这些够吗？ 求你了给分吧。
英语笑话100篇+翻译
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这里的英语笑话都有译文！
A teacher said to her class:
"Who was the first man?"
“George Washington," a little boy shouted promptly.
"How do you make out that George Washington was the first man?" asked the teacher, *** iling indulgently.
"Because, " said the little boy, "he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen."
But at this point a larger boy held up his hand.
"Well," said the teacher to him, "who do you think was the first man?"
"I don't know what his name was," said the larger boy, "but I know it wasn't George Washington, ma'am, because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, of course, there must have been a man ahead of him."
有个老师问班上的学生：
“谁是第一个男人？”
“乔治·华盛顿，”一个小男孩当即叫道。
“你怎么知道乔治·华盛顿是第一个男人呢？”老师问道，宽容地微笑着。
小男孩说：“因为他是战时第一，和时第一，国人心中第一。”
这时一个大点儿的男孩举起手来。
“那么，”老师对他说，“你认为谁是第一个男人呢？”
“我不知道他的名字，”大点儿的男孩说，“但我知道不是乔治·华盛顿，老师。因为历史书上说，乔治·华盛顿取了一个寡妇，所以在他前面肯定还有一个男人。”
英语笑话【短】
1. Virtue Many years after receiving my graduate degree, I returned to the State University of New York at Binghamton as a faculty member. One day in a crowded elevator, someone remarked on its inefficiency. I said the elevators had not changed in the 20 years since I began there as a student.When the door finally opened, I felt a passionate pat on my back, and turned to see an elderly nun *** iling at me. "You'll get that degree, dear," she whispered. "Perseverance is a virtue." 美 德 获取研究生学位多年以后，我回到位于宾翰顿的纽约州立大学当教员。
一天，电梯里很拥挤，有人抱怨电梯效率太低。我说自我在那里当学生起，20年来电梯一直没有换过。
最后当电梯门打开时，我感到有人在我的背上同情地拍了一下，回过头来我看到一位年长的修女正在朝我微笑。“你会拿到学位的，亲爱的，”她低声说道：“坚持不懈是一种美德。”
2. Difference"I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles. "When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down." 区 别 “研究生班和本科生很容易就能区别开来，”在洛杉矶加利福利亚州立大学给我们研究生上工程学课的老师如此说。“我说‘下午好’，本科生们回答说‘下午好’。
研究生们则把我说的话记在笔记本上。”3.Too Long The travel editor of a newspaper called, saying she was finally using an article I had written several years earlier. She wanted to be sure the tour information was still correct. "I also wanted to make certain," she sheepishly confessed, "that you're still alive. Whenever the writer has died, I know I've held a story too long." 太久 一家报纸的旅行版编辑打开电话，说她终于决定要采用一篇我几年前写的文章。
她想确定那旅游信息是否还可靠。“我还想确定，”她怯怯地坦白道：“您是否还健在。
每次发现作者已经不在人世了，我才知道我将文章压得太久了。”4.Charge for Bread and Butter Some years ago, my dad, an attorney, took me to a fancy restaurant in Now York City. When the bill arrived, there was a $1.50 charge for bread and butter. Dad paid the bill, including the charge for bread and butter. However, the next day, he sent a letter to the resturant stating that the charge was uncalled for. Enclosed in the same envelope was a bill for $500 in legal services.Someone from the restaurant called immediately and asked, "What is this $500 bill for? We never ordered any legal services." Dad replied, "I never ordered any bread and butter." The $1.50 was returned without delay.面包和黄油费 几年前，我当律师的爸爸带我去纽约的一家高档餐馆。
帐单上来时，上面有1.5美元的面包和黄油费。爸爸付了帐，连同面包和黄油的收费一齐付了。
但是第二天，他给餐馆寄了一封信，说那项收费是没有道理的。随信还寄上了一张500美元的法律服务机构的收费单。
餐馆马上打来电话，问道：“这500美元的收费单是怎么回事？我们从来没有要什么法律机构的服务。” 爸爸答道，“我也从来没有要什么面包和黄油。”
那1.5美元立即就寄了回来。5. Sleeping Pills Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills.Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning.""That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday？" 安眠药 鲍勃晚上失眠。
他去看医生，医生给他开了一些强力安眠药。星期天晚上鲍勃吃了药，睡得很好，在闹钟响之前就醒了过来。
他到了办公室，遛达进去，对老板说：“我今天早上起床一点麻烦都没有。” “好啊！”老板吼道，“那你星期一和星期二到哪儿去了？” 英文谚语大全 cqwlzx/Article/ShowArticle?ArticleID=275 Each bird loves to hear himself sing. 鸟儿都爱听自己唱歌。
Each day brings its own bread. 天无绝人之路。Each man is the architect of his own fate. 命运掌握在自己手中。
Eagles catch no flies. 大人物不计较小事情。Eagles fly alone, but sheep flock together. 鹰单飞，羊群集。
Early mistakes are the seeds of future trouble. 早期的错误可以酿成日后的麻烦。Early sow, early mow. 播种早的收获早。
Early start makes easy stages. 早开始是成功的保证。Early to bed and early to rise make a man healthy, wealthy and wise. 早睡早起，令人健康、富有而且聪明。
英文短笑话 最简单的 要短的 四年级
There is a family, is very rich. One day, his son to go to school, mother asked her son, go out alone in our family was very rich, his son to keep in
Heart. The Chinese class, the teacher asked the students to write an article about the family. Son: my family is poor. My mother is very poor, very poor, dad was very poor, my servant is poor, the gardener is poor, the driver is very poor, very poor。
有一户人家，很有钱。一天，儿子要去上学，妈妈叫 儿子，出去后别说咱们家很有钱，儿子牢记在
心。语文课上，老师叫同学们写一篇关于家庭的作文。 儿子写：我家很穷。我很穷，妈妈很穷，爸爸很穷，我家的仆人很穷，园丁很穷，司机很穷，保姆很穷。。
英文短笑话
1、Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home.
老师：谁能回到我下一个问题，谁就可以回家了。
One boy throws his bag out the window.
一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。
Teacher: who just threw that?!
老师：谁刚刚把书包扔出去了?
Boy: Me! I’m going home now.
男孩：我!我现在要回家了。
2、What dog can jump higher than a building?
什么狗比大楼跳的还高?
Anydog, buildings can't jump!
任何一只狗，大楼又跳不起来。
3、What has a head, a tail, and no body?
什么有头、有尾，但是没有身体?
A coin!
硬币。
4、What has one eye but cannot see?
什么有一只眼睛，却看不见?
A needle.
针。
5、Wife: "How would you describe me?"
妻子：你会怎么形容我呢?
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
丈夫：ABCDEFGHIJK.
Wife: "What does that mean?"
妻子：那是什么意思?
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
丈夫：迷人的、魅力的、可爱的、令人愉悦的、优雅的、时髦的、漂亮的和火辣的。
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
妻子：哇，谢谢，但是“IJK”是什么意思呢?
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
丈夫：开个玩笑!
6、Boy: Is this seat empty?
男孩：这个座位是空的么？
Girl: Yes and this one will be if you sit down.
女孩：是的，如果你坐下，我的座位也将是空的。
7、My little dog can't read
我的狗不识字
Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!
布朗夫人：哦，亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了！
Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!
史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊！
Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.
布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。”
8、My Wife Will Exchange Them
反正我太太明天会来换的
A gentleman walks into a store and asked for a pair of gloves.
一位先生走进一家商店要买副手套。
″Cloth or leather﹖″ asked the salesperson.
“您是要布的还是皮的？”售货员问。
″Makes no difference ″replied customer.
“没什么区别。”这位顾客回答。
″What color﹖″ asked the clerk.
“那您要什么颜色的呢？”售货员又问。
″Any″ he responded.
“什么颜色都成。”他回答。
″Size﹖″
“号码呢？”
″Give me whatever you prefer″ the gentleman said slightly exasperated. ″My wife will be back tomorrow to exchange them.″
“您就随便给我拿一副吧，”这位顾客有点不耐烦了，“反正我太太明天都会来换的。”
英语小笑话，越短越好，带翻译
1、Goldfish金鱼
Stan: I won 92 goldfish.
Fred: Where are you going to keep them?
Stan: In the bathroom 。
Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath?
Stan: Blindfold（蒙眼睛）them!
斯丹：我赢了 92 条金鱼。
弗雷德：你想在哪儿养它们？
斯丹：浴室。
弗雷德：但是你想洗澡时怎么办？
斯丹：蒙住它们的眼睛！
2、 The Revenge 欺骗的代价
Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With alow voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmerJones." Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone after you." Johnson:"But I want you to." Wife: "But why?" Johnson: "Jonesonce cheated me in a horse deal!"
老农约翰逊就要死了。他的家人都站在床边。他声音低沉地对妻子说：“我死后，我想你嫁给农夫琼斯。” 妻子说：“不，在你死后，我不能嫁给任何人。” 约翰逊：“但我希望你这么做。” 妻子：“为什么？” 约翰逊：“因为琼斯曾在一笔贩马的交易中欺骗了我。”
3、I think that I'm a chicken 我想我是一只鸡
Psychiatrist: What's your problem?
Patient: I think I'm a chicken.
Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?
Patient: Ever since I was an egg!
精神病医师：你哪里不舒服？
病人：我认为我是一只鸡。
精神病医师：这种情况从什么时候开始的？
病人：从我还是一只蛋的时候开始。
4、How do I get the gum out我怎么把口香糖取出来
Distributing chewing gum to the passengers, the stewardess explained it was to keeptheir ears from popping. When the plane landed, one of the passengers rushed upto her and said, "I'm meeting my wife right away. How do I get the gum outfrom my ears?"
当空中小姐给乘客们发口香糖的时候，她解释说口香糖有助于他们防止耳鸣。飞机着陆后，一位乘客跑到这位空中小姐面前，说道：“ 我马上就要见到我妻子了。我怎么才能把口香糖从耳朵里面取出来呢？”
5、 Where Am I 我在哪儿
An Englishman lost his way while he was driving in the countryside. He saw afarmer working in the field nearby, so he went nearer in his car and asked the farmer,"Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?" "Yes, " the farmerlooked at him strangely and said, "you are in your car, sir."
一个英国人在乡下开车时迷了路，他看见一个农民正在附近的地里干活。于是他就把车开过去问那位农民：“劳驾，您能告诉我我现在这是在哪儿吗？” “可以。”农夫奇怪地看了看他，然后说道：“你现在在你的车子里，先生。”
6、Chiefis at the wedding 长官在婚礼上
A police stopped a motorist who was speeding on the street.
"But officer," the man said, "I can explain."
"Just be quiet," snapped the officer."I'm going to put you injail until the chief gets back."
"But ,officer, I …."
"I said to keep quiet! You are going to jail!"
A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Youare lucky because the chief is at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a goodmood when he gets back."
"Are you sure?" answered the man in the cell. "I'm thegroom."
大街上的一个超速驾驶者被警察拦住了。“但是警官”这个人说道，“我可以解释的”。“保持安静”，警察突然说道。“我将把你送往监狱，直到长官回来。“但是，警察，我，，，”。“我说过了保持安静，你要到监狱了。”几小时后，警察向监狱里看了看说道“算你运气好，因为我们的长官正在他女儿的婚礼上。他将带着一个愉快的心情回来的。” “你确定”在牢房里的这个人说道。“我就是新郎呀”。
7、Who Is the Laziest 谁最懒
Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you aquestion. Who is the laziest person in your class?
Tom: I don't know, father.
Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing andwriting, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work?
Tom: Our teacher, father.
父亲：哎，汤姆，今天我跟你们老师谈过，现在我想问你个问题。你们班上谁最懒？汤姆：我不知道，爸爸。父亲：啊，不对，你知道！想想看，当别的孩子们都在做作业、写字时，谁在课堂上坐着，只是看人家做功课？汤姆：我们老师，爸爸。
8、TwoBirds 两只鸟
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now whocan tell us which is which?
Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher: Please tell us.
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside theswallow.
老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。老师：请说说看。学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
