笑话哦
很搞笑的冷笑话哦 !

对自然敬畏的笑话英语(敬畏自然的英文名言)

本文目录一览:

珍爱生命敬畏自然英语作文?

当朔风吹响哨子,雪花赶来集结,在我门前的场地;千军万马,组成一支浩浩荡荡的队伍:我们称为白雪军团。

它们静静的,等着接受我的检阅;言语不通,我给它们下令,再简洁明了,它们也听不懂,也不起作用。它们千里迢迢赶来向我报到,我不忍心让它们就此解散。

僵持的结果,是我灰溜溜地逃窜,丢下它们成乌合之众:一群失去统领的士兵。

它们白来一场,无比迷茫,无比寒心,流着泪离去;被水收编,天南地北,服从江河的调遣……

活,是白雪军团。

死,流淌着清澈澈的灵魂……cite=

爱护环境的英语名言

1、碧水蓝天,笑容自然!

Blue sky, natural smile!

2、心中有情,脚下留情。

The hearts of love, at the foot of mercy.

3、保护树木是第一。

Protection of trees is the first.

4、家园由我来保护。

Home by me to protect.

5、把绿色带入校园。

Bring green into the campus.

6、你来绕一绕,我来笑一笑。

You come around, I smile.

7、哭泣的草原地球在哭泣。

The crying Earth is crying.

8、小草青青,脚下留情。

The grass is green, the foot.

9、保护环境就是保护生产力。

To protect the environment is to protect the productive forces.

10、编织爱心,保护环境。

Weave love, protect the environment.

11、欣赏荒野回归自然。

Enjoy the wilderness return to nature.

12、保护环境,就是爱惜生命。

To protect the environment is to cherish life.

13、尊崇自然敬畏生命。

Reverence for nature and reverence for life.

14、让绿色与我们共存!

Let green and we coexist!

15、拯救地球,一起动手。

Save the earth, go with it.

16、垃圾分类,循环回收。

Garbage classification, recycling.

17、保护环境,刻不容缓。

Protect the environment, no delay.

18、节能做的好,朝朝无烦恼。

Energy to do good, toward the no trouble.

19、植树造林,功在千秋。

Afforestation, reactive power in the future.

20、尊崇自然、敬畏生命。

Reverence for nature, reverence for life.

21、小草青青,脚步轻轻。

Grass green, footsteps gently.

22、让白色染污永远消失!

Let the white pollution disappear forever!

23、让绿色的希望从校园萌芽!

Green hope from the campus bud!

24、绿色社会,动手筑造。

To build green society.

25、痰吐在地,辱写在心。

Spit in the ground, shame on the heart.

26、幸福就是天蓝山青水绿。

Happiness is the blue mountain blue duck.

27、环境好,生活就好。

Environment is good, life is good.

28、校园整洁,大家开心。

The campus clean, everybody happy.

29、让校园成为绿色殿堂。

To make the campus a green house.

30、人在车中坐车在画中行!

People in the car in the car in the painting!

31、人人为环保,环保为人人。

Everyone is environmental protection, environmental protection for everyone.

32、把绿色还给地球。

Return the green to the earth.

33、热带雨林——地球的肺。

Tropical rain forest - the lungs of the earth.

34、人要美,地球更要美!

People want the United States, the earth is more beautiful!

35、多一份绿色,多一份健康。

More green, more health.

36、护我环境,为我中华!

Protect my environment, for my chinese!

37、环境保护,人人有责。

Environmental protection is everyone's responsibility.

38、保护环境,造福人民。

To protect the environment and to benefit the people.

39、让绿色的希望从校园萌芽。

Green hope from the campus bud.

40、促绿色消费,做绿色选民。

Promote green consumption, green voters.

41、保护环境,有益健康。

To protect the environment and to protect the environment.

42、保护环境,从我做起。

Protect the environment, from my start.

43、尊天重地敬天爱人。

Respect heaven and earth to love.

44、我是环保一员。

I am a member of environmental protection.

45、保护环境,少说多做。

Protect the environment, shaoshuoduozuo.

46、节约用水就是珍惜生命。

Saving water is to cherish life.

47、莫踏青草,勿采红花。

Don't tread grass, not picking flowers.

48、爱花爱草爱树爱校园。

Grass flower love love love campus.

49、环境保护从我身边做起。

Environmental protection from my side to start.

50、绿化环境,净化心灵。

Green environment, purify the mind.

51、尊天重地、敬天爱人。

Respect heaven and earth, and respect the day of love.

52、保护环境,保存希望。

Protect the environment, save the hope.

53、赞化天地、道法自然。

Zanhua heaven and nature.

54、珍惜资源,永续利用。

Cherish the resources, sustainable utilization.

55、萋萋芳草青,贱踏何忍心?

The luxuriant green, base on where to?

56、让校园成为绿色殿堂!

To make the campus a green house!

57、绿色消费,消费绿色。

Green consumption, green consumption.

58、芳草依依,大家怜惜。

Grass Yiyi, pity you.

59、不要让绿色从身边消失。

Don't let green disappear from the side.

60、用爱心呵护每一片绿色。

Care for each piece of green with love.

61、鸟语花香,爱赏共享。

A shared love birds'twitter and fragrance of flowers.

62、娇娇小草,请足下留情。

Jiao Jiao grass, please you.

63、善待地球就是善待自己。

To treat the earth is to treat yourself.

64、你的行动代表花的未来。

Your actions rePsent the future of flowers.

65、用好你的手,垃圾无处溜。

Make good use of your hands, garbage everywhere.

66、静以修身,俭以养德。

Static to self-cultivation, Kim tak.

67、给我一片绿,还你一片荫。

Give me a green, but also you a shadow.

68、美化生活,净化心灵。

Beautify life, purify the soul.

69、欣赏荒野、回归自然。

Enjoy the wilderness, return to nature.

70、我很怕羞,请别碰我!

I was very shy, please don't touch me!

71、举手之劳,美化校园。

No, to beautify the campus.

72、保护蓝天碧水。

Protect the blue sky.

73、美我校园重在每一举动。

The beauty of my campus focuses on every move.

74、保护自然界,关爱家园。

Protect nature, love home.

75、含一滴水,还一份真情!

With a drop of water, but also a true!

76、绿色校园,绿色生活。

Green campus, green life.

77、判天地之美析万物之理。

Judge the beauty of heaven and earth and the reason of all things.

78、郁郁葱葱,创新州。

A wild profusion of vegetation, the innovation of the state.

79、爱无限,绿无边。

Love is infinite, green is boundless.

80、保护环境=保护自己。

Protect the environment = protect yourself.

81、节约为本,治污优先。

Save for the pollution control priority.

82、环境你我他,绿色靠大家。

Environment you me him, green by everyone.

83、茵茵绿草地,脚下请留情。

Lush green grass, please watch your step.

84、少抽一支烟,多栽一棵树。

To smoke a cigarette, to plant a tree.

85、小草微微笑,请你绕一绕。

Small grass smile, please go around.

86、珍惜资源永续利用。

Cherish the sustainable utilization of resources.

87、保护地球等于保护自己。

To protect the earth is to protect itself.

88、节约能源,人人有责!

Save energy, is everyone's responsibility!

89、地面爱干净,请您手留情。

The ground clean, please hand.

90、水是一切生命的起源点。

Water is the origin of all life.

91、环境你不爱,美景不常在。

Environment, you do not love, the beauty is not often in the.

92、让地球妈妈永远年轻美丽。

Let the earth mother forever young and beautiful.

93、保护水环境,节约水资源。

Protect the water environment, save water resources.

94、青山清我目流水静我耳。

Castle Peak clear my eyes water quiet my ears.

95、节能解危机,地球有转机。

Energy saving solutions to the crisis, the earth has a turn for the better.

96、栏杆拦人,人自拦心。

Railing railing, people from the heart.

97、学校是我家,环保靠大家。

School is my home, environmental protection by everyone.

98、拯救地球就是拯救未来。

To save the earth is to save the future.

99、保护环境,人人戒烟。

Protect the environment, everyone quit smoking.

100、绿色是我们的家园。

Green is our home.

对自然敬畏的笑话英语(敬畏自然的英文名言)插图

“人与自然和谐相处”的英语小故事?

A Girl Just Like Mother

No matter which girl he brought home, the young man found disapproval from his mother. A friend gave him advice.

“Find a girl just like your mother—then she's bound to like her.

So the young man searched and searched, and finally found the girl.He told his friendly adviser:

“Just like you said, I found a girl who looked,talked,dressed, and even cooked like mother.And just as you said,mother liked her”

“So,”asked the friend,“what happened?”

“Nothing,”said the young man.“My father hates her!”

37.和母亲一样的女孩

无论带哪一个女孩回家,这位青年人总会遭到母亲的反对。一位朋友劝他说:

“找一个和你母亲一样的女孩——那她一定会喜欢她。”

于是这位青年人不停地找啊找,终于找到了这么个女孩。

他对他友好的忠告者说:

“正像你说的那样,我找到一个长相、谈吐、穿着打扮,甚至连烹饪都和我母亲一样的女孩。也正像你说的那样,我母亲喜欢她。”

“那后来呢?”朋友问。

“没什么,”青年人说。“我父亲讨厌她!”

5个浅显易懂的英语小笑话有哪些?

1、爆笑英语小笑话1:Who are stupid?谁蠢?

A teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying “Everyone who thinks you’re stupid stand up!”

Little Johnny then stood up.

The teacher said “Do you think you’re stupid Johnny?”

“No ma’am but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!”

一个老师在对学生们讲心理学,“谁认为自己蠢就站起来?”她一开始就说。

小约翰尼站了起来。

“你认为你很蠢吗,小约翰尼?”老师问。

“不是的,老师,我只是不喜欢看你一个人站着。”

2、爆笑英语小笑话2:A great man一名伟人

Teacher: Would Shakespeare be a greatman if he were still alive today?

Student: Of course. He must be a great man for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.

老师:如果莎士比亚还活着,他会是一名伟人吗?

学生:当然。因为到目前为止,还没有人活到400多岁。

3、爆笑英语小笑话3:Two Cute dogs

A man walks into a shop and sees a cute little dog. He asks the shopkeeper “Does

your dog bite?”

The shopkeeper says “No my dog does not bite.”

The man tries to pet the dog and the dog bites him. “Ouch” he says “I thought you said your dog does not bite!”

The shopkeeper replies “That is not my dog.”

一个男人走进了一家商店,看到了一个可爱的小狗,于是他问店主:“你的狗咬人吗?”

店主说:“不,我的狗不咬人。”

这个男人就试图抚摸狗,然后狗咬了他。“哎呀”他说:“我还以为你说你的狗不咬人呢!”

店主和他说:“那不是我的狗。”

4、爆笑英语小笑话4:Four gold teeth四颗金牙

6.Policeman: Why didn’t you shout for help when you were robbed of your watch?

Man: If I had opened my mouth they’d have found my four gold teeth. That would be much worse.

警察:有人抢你的手表时,你为什么不呼救呢?

男子:要是我张口的话,他们就会发现我的四颗金牙。那就更糟了。

5、爆笑英语小笑话5:Barking dogs don’t bite吠狗不咬人

The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.

“It’s all right” said a gentleman “don’t be afraid. Don’t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don’t bite?”

“Ah yes” answered the little girl. “I know the proverb but does the dog know the proverb too?”

一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。

“没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:‘吠狗不咬人。’”

“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?”

英语笑话

一起体验英语

Hold fast to dreams For if dreams die Life is a broken-winged bird That cannot fly Hold fast to dreams For if dreams go Life is a barren field Frozen with snow

经典的广告词及其翻译 3 2005-3-29 星期二(Tuesday) 晴

1 Money is not everything. There‘s Mastercard Visa.

钞票不是万能的,有时还需要信用卡.

2 One should love animals. They are so tasty.

每个人都应该热爱动物,因为它们很好吃.

3 Love the neighbor. But don‘t get caught.

要用心去爱你的邻居,不过不要让她的老公知道.

4 Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.

每个成功男人的背后都有一个女人,每个不成功男人的背后都有两个女人。

5 Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.

再快乐的单身汉迟早也会结婚,幸福不是永久的嘛.

6 The wise never marry, And when they marry they become otherwise.

聪明人都是未婚的,结婚的人很难再聪明起来.

7 Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.

成功是一个相关名词,他会给你带来很多不相关的亲戚(联系).

8 Never put off the work till tomorrow what you can put off today.

不要等明天交不上差再找借口, 今天就要找好.

9 Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop.

爱情就象照片,需要大量的暗房时间来培养.

10 Children in backseats cause accidents. Accidents in backseats cause children.

后排座位上的小孩会生出意外, 后排座位上的意外会生出小孩.

11 "Your future depends on your dreams." So go to sleep.

"现在的梦想决定着你的将来",所以还是再睡一会吧.

12 There should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning.

应该有更好的方式开始新一天,而不是千篇一律的在每个上午都醒来.

13 "Hard work never kills anybody." But why take the risk? "

努力工作不会导致死亡!"不过我不会用自己去证明.

14 "Work fascinates me." I can look at it for hours! "

工作好有意思耶!"尤其是看着别人工作.

15 God made relatives; Thank God we can choose our friends.

神决定了谁是你的亲戚,幸运的是在选择朋友方面他给了你留了余地。

16 When two‘s company, three‘s the result!

两个人的状态是不稳定的,三个人才是!

17 A dress is like a barbed fence. It protects the premises without restricting the view.

服饰就象铁丝网,它阻止你冒然行动,但并不妨碍你尽情地观看.

18 The more you learn, the more you know, The more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn.

学的越多,知道的越多, 知道的越多;忘记的越多, 忘记的越多;知道的越少, 为什么学来着?!

 

1。Good to the last drop.

滴滴香浓,意犹未尽。(麦斯威尔咖啡)

2. Obey your thirst.

服从你的渴望。(雪碧)

3. The new digital era.

数码新时代。(索尼影碟机)

4. We lead. Others copy.

我们领先,他人仿效。(理光复印机)

5. Impossible made possible.

使不可能变为可能。(佳能打印机)

6. Take time to indulge.

尽情享受吧!(雀巢冰激凌)

7. The relentless pursuit of perfection.

不懈追求完美。 (凌志轿车)

8. Poetry in motion, dancing close to me.

动态的诗,向我舞近。(丰田汽车)

9. Come to where the flavour is. Marlboro Country.

光临风韵之境——万宝路世界。(万宝路香烟)

10.To me, the past is black and white, but the future is always color.

对我而言,过去平淡无奇;而未来,却是绚烂缤纷。(轩尼诗酒)

11. Just do it. 只管去做。(耐克运动鞋)

12. Ask for more. 渴望无限。(百事流行鞋)

13. The taste is great. 味道好极了。(雀巢咖啡)

14. Feel the new space. 感受新境界。(三星电子)

15. Intelligence everywhere.

智慧演绎,无处不在。(摩托罗拉手机)

16. The choice of a new generation.

新一代的选择。(百事可乐)

17. We integrate, you communicate.

我们集大成,您超越自我。(三菱电工)

18. Take TOSHIBA, take the world.

拥有东芝,拥有世界。(东芝电子)

19. Let’s make things better.

让我们做得更好。(飞利浦电子)

20. No business too small, no problem too big.

没有不做的小生意,没有解决不了的大问题。 (IBM公司)

NISSAN 汽车——

Life is a journey. Enjoy the ride.

译:生活就是一次旅行,祝您旅途愉快。

Gatorade 饮料——

Life is a sport,drink it up.

译:生活就是一场运动,喝下它。

Tequila 酒——

Life is harsh,your tequila shouldn’t be.

译:生活是苦涩的,而您的tequila 酒却不是。

防止艾滋病公益广告——

There’s life after sex.

译:在性之外还有生活。

Wolderness 系统——

Life is discovery. And we have directions to get you there.

译:生活就是发现,让我们去发现吧。

“锐步”运动鞋——

Five feet nine inches in his socks.

Ten feet tall in his shoes.

译:光脚身高五英尺九英寸。穿上“锐步”身高10英尺。

美国明尼苏达州科学博物馆——

The world has a big backyard. Our planet is filled with hidden

places.Dramatic examples of earth’s evolution. Witness seven

of the world’s most diverse landscapes. Come out and play in

the Greatest Places.

译:世界有个大后院。我们的星球到处都有不为人知的地方。它们是地

球演化的生动例证。目睹世界上七种完全不同的自然景观。来吧,在最

壮观的地方畅游吧。

金科专业办公服务——

Trying to do it all yourself doesn’t always make you look like

a hero.

译:所有重担一肩挑并不会总使你像英雄一般。

梅塞德兹—奔驰汽车——

Feel like a million for $970,000 less.

It cost less than breakfast at the White House.

译:少付了97万美元,却得道百万美元的享受。它比白宫的一顿早餐还便宜。

British Airways ——

With our new E-ticket,all you have to bring isyourself.

译:选用我们的E号机票,阁下不需携带任何东西,只要带着自己。

约翰逊的钓具——

With our line,you detect the fish before the fish detects you.

译:用我们的钓线,你可以在鱼儿发现你之前先找到它。

ERICSSON移动电话——

 

13. The taste is great. 味道好极了。(雀巢咖啡)

14. Feel the new space. 感受新境界。(三星电子)

15. Intelligence everywhere.

智慧演绎,无处不在。(摩托罗拉手机)

16. The choice of a new generation.

新一代的选择。(百事可乐)

17. We integrate, you communicate.

我们集大成,您超越自我。(三菱电工)

18. Take TOSHIBA, take the world.

拥有东芝,拥有世界。(东芝电子)

19. Let’s make things better.

让我们做得更好。(飞利浦电子)

20. No business too small, no problem too big.

没有不做的小生意,没有解决不了的大问题。 (IBM公司)

#日志日期:2005-3-29 星期二(Tuesday) 晴

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© 天涯社区经典的广告词及其翻译 1

作者:ella_mengzi 提交日期:2005-03-29 14:10

NISSAN 汽车——

Life is a journey. Enjoy the ride.

译:生活就是一次旅行,祝您旅途愉快。

Gatorade 饮料——

Life is a sport,drink it up.

译:生活就是一场运动,喝下它。

Tequila 酒——

Life is harsh,your tequila shouldn’t be.

译:生活是苦涩的,而您的tequila 酒却不是。

防止艾滋病公益广告——

There’s life after sex.

译:在性之外还有生活。

Wolderness 系统——

Life is discovery. And we have directions to get you there.

译:生活就是发现,让我们去发现吧。

“锐步”运动鞋——

Five feet nine inches in his socks.

Ten feet tall in his shoes.

译:光脚身高五英尺九英寸。穿上“锐步”身高10英尺。

美国明尼苏达州科学博物馆——

The world has a big backyard. Our planet is filled with hidden

places.Dramatic examples of earth’s evolution. Witness seven

of the world’s most diverse landscapes. Come out and play in

the Greatest Places.

译:世界有个大后院。我们的星球到处都有不为人知的地方。它们是地

球演化的生动例证。目睹世界上七种完全不同的自然景观。来吧,在最

壮观的地方畅游吧。

金科专业办公服务——

Trying to do it all yourself doesn’t always make you look like

a hero.

译:所有重担一肩挑并不会总使你像英雄一般。

梅塞德兹—奔驰汽车——

Feel like a million for $970,000 less.

It cost less than breakfast at the White House.

译:少付了97万美元,却得道百万美元的享受。它比白宫的一顿早餐还便宜。

British Airways ——

With our new E-ticket,all you have to bring isyourself.

译:选用我们的E号机票,阁下不需携带任何东西,只要带着自己。

约翰逊的钓具——

With our line,you detect the fish before the fish detects you.

译:用我们的钓线,你可以在鱼儿发现你之前先找到它。

ERICSSON移动电话——

Make yourself heard.

译:倾听自我。

有什么好的英语笑话关于中国

英语笑话(一)

Q: What's the difference between a monkey and a flea?

A: A monkey can have fleas, but a flea can't have monkeys.

猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢?你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。但除此之外呢,那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤,而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。这个答案很有意思吧?

Q: How can you most irritate a farmer?

A: By treading on his corn?

如果你踩了农夫的玉米或是谷物,他肯定会生气的;而如果你踩了农夫脚底的鸡眼,他会更生气。Corn既可以表示“玉米/谷物”,也有“鸡眼”的意思。

Q: Which is the strongest creature in the world?

A: The snail. It carries its house on its back.

因为snail(蜗牛)的后背上总是背着一所房子,所以说蜗牛是世界上最强壮的生物是不足为奇的。你说呢?

Q: What do people do in a clock factory?

A: They make faces all day.

一看到make faces这个短语,你可千万别以为是在钟表厂工作的人整天都做鬼脸呀!因为除了这个意思以外,它还可以从字面上解释为制造钟面。

Q: How do you stop a sleepwalker from walking in his sleep?

A: Keep him awake.

怎样才能不让梦游者(sleepwalker)梦游(walk in his sleep)呢?最简单的方法就是不让他睡觉。虽然这不是治疗方法,但如果让梦游者醒着呢,他的确就不会去梦游了。

英语笑话(二)

He is really somebody

-- My uncle has 1000 men under him.

-- He is really somebody. What does he do?

-- A maintenance man in a cemetery.

他真是一个大人物

-- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。

-- 他真是一个大人物。干什么的?

-- 墓地守墓人。

英语笑话(三)

Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.

At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."

它们是从美国直接带来的

一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久,到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。在银行柜台,银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票,看是否有假。

这种做法让老妇人很不耐烦,最后实在忍耐不住说:“相信我,先生,也请你相信这些钞票。这都是真正的美元,它们是从美国直接带来的。”

英语笑话(四)my little dog can't read

Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!

Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!

Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.

我的狗不识字

布朗夫人:哦,

亲爱的,我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!

史密斯夫人:可是你该在报纸上登广告啊!

布朗夫人:没有用的,我的小狗不认识字。”

英语笑话(五)Bring me the winner

-- Waiter, this lobster has only one claw.

-- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight.

-- Well, bring me the winner then.

给我那个打赢的吧

-- 服务员,

这个龙虾只有一只爪。

-- 对不起,先生,这只肯定打过架了。

-- 哦, 那给我那个打赢的吧。

英语笑话(六)The mean man's party.

The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."

"Why use my elbow and foot?"

"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-hangded, are you?"

吝啬鬼请客

一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说:“你上到五楼,找中间那个门,然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后,再用你的脚把门推开。”

“为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”

“你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪,你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答。

英语笑话(七)Advice for "Kid"

A bit of advice for those about to retire. If you are only 65, never move to a retirement community. Everybody else is n their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be moved, lifted or loaded, they yell,"Get the kid."

忠告“年轻者”

这里想对将要退休者提一点忠告。如果你只有65岁的话,

千万别进退休社区。因为那里人人都七八十岁或者八九十岁了。每当要搬东西,抬东西或者装东西时,他们就叫喊,“让小的干吧。”

英语笑话(八)Which woman?

One evening I drove my husband's car to the shopping mall.

On my return, I noticed that how dusty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a bit.When I finally entered the house, I called out."The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."

My husband looked up and said, "Mom's here?"

哪一位女人?

一天晚上我开着丈夫的车去购物,回来后发现车身沾满灰尘,于是擦洗了一阵。当我终于走进屋里时大声喊:“世界上最爱你的女人刚擦洗了你的车灯和挡风玻璃。”

我丈夫抬头看了看,说:“妈妈来了?”

英语笑话(九)The doctor lives downstairs

"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me."

He surveyed her from head to foot. "Madam," he said at length, "I've just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty pounds. Second, your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, I'm an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."

医生住在楼下

“医生”她冲进屋后大声说道。

“我想让你坦率地说我到底得了什么病。”

他从头到脚打量打量她,然后大声说:“太太,我有三件事要对你说。第一,您的体重需要减少大约50磅;第二,如果您要用上十分之一的胭脂和口红,您的美貌将会改变。第三,我是一位画家——医生住在楼下。”

英语笑话(十)One Engine Left

A 747 was halfway across the Atlantic when the captain got on the loud speaker, "Attention, passengers. We have lost one of our engines, but we can certainly reach London with the three we have left. Unfortunately, we will arrive an hour late as a r esult."

Shortly thereafter, the passengers heard the captain's voice again, "Guess what, folks. We just lost our third engine, but please be assured we can fly with only one. We will now arrive in London three hours late."

At this point, one passenger became furious. "For Pete's sake," he shouted, "If we lose another engine, we'll be up here all night!"

只剩一个引擎

一架747客机正在跨越大西洋时,喇叭里传来了机长的声音:“旅客们请注意,我们的四个引擎中有一个丢失了。但剩下的三个引擎会把我们带到伦敦的。只是我们要因此晚到一小时 。” 过了一会儿,旅客们又听到机长的声音:“各位,你们猜怎么啦 ?我们刚又掉了第三个引擎。但请你们相信好了。只有一个引擎我们也能飞,但要晚三个小时了。” 正在这时,一位乘客非常气愤地说:“看在上帝的份上,如果我们再掉一个引擎,我们就要整夜都要呆在天上了。”

回答者:lovemydream - 高级经理 七级 7-5 10:08

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其他回答共 2 条

Logic Reasoning 逻辑推理

A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic.

"Here is the situation," she said. "a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yellin

g for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows that he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"

A girl raised her hand and asked, "to draw out all of his savings?"

逻辑推理

小学四年级的教师正在给学生们上一堂逻辑课。她举了这么一个例子:“有这样一种情况,一个男人在河中心的船上钓鱼,突然失去重心掉进了水里。于是他开始挣扎并喊救命。他的妻子听到了他的喊声,知道他并不会游泳,所以她就急忙跑向河岸。谁能告诉我这是为什么?” 一个女生举手答道,“是不是去取他的存款?”

[注]bank在英语中除了我们平时很熟悉的“银行”之外,还有“河岸”的意思。

Have You Ceased Beating Your Wife?你停止打你老婆了吗?

This story is told of a browbeating counsel,who habitually endeavored to terrorize his opponent‘s witnesses.

One witness rather tended to preface his replies with lengthy explanations.

“I want‘yes’or‘no,’”thundered counsel.“There is no need for you to argue the point!”

“But there are some questions which cannot be answered by‘yes’or‘no,’”mildly responded the witness.

“There are not!” snapped the lawyer.

“Oh,” said the witness,“answer this then:“Have you ceased beating your wife?”

这个故事讲的是一个咄咄逼人的辩护律师,他惯于尽量去恐吓对方的证人。

有一个证人有点倾向于在回答问题之前做冗长的解释。

“我要你回答‘是’或者‘不是’,”辩护律师怒喝道: “你没有必要就这个问题进行争论。”

“可是有些问题无法用‘是’或者‘不是’来回答。”这位证人温和地回敬他。

“不存在这样的问题!”律师厉声打断他。

“噢,”证人说:“那么请你回答这个问题:“你停止打你老婆了吗?”

Two Birds

Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell us.

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

两只鸟

老师: 这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?

学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。

老师:请说说看。

学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。

"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?"

"A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.

鱼网

"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安?" 老师发问道。

"把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。" 小女孩回答道。

昨天夜里我爸妈表演“混合双打”

Teacher of Physical Education: Have you ever seen mixed doubles,boys?

体育老师:孩子们,你们见过男女混合双打吗?

Nick: Yes,sir. Quite of ten. I saw it even last night.

尼克:见过,老师,经常见。就在昨天夜里我还见过呢!

Teacher: Please tell us some thing about it.

老师:那你给大家讲讲当时的情形吧。

Nick: Oh,sorry,sir. My father always says, "Domestic shame should not be published.”

尼克:啊,对不起,老师。我爸爸常说:“家丑不可外扬。”(

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