笑话哦
很搞笑的冷笑话哦 !

简短英语笑话篇翻译(英语笑话简单带翻译)

本文目录一览:

简短的英语笑话带翻译大全?

民间笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事型别,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。我整理了简短的英语笑话带翻译,欢迎阅读!

简短的英语笑话带翻译:如何不被查酒驾

Dear miss know-it-all, how can it go out for an evening of drinking and not tick getting a DUI?

亲爱的百事通,你知道怎么在晚上喝酒还不属于酒后驾车吗?

Go to a ballpark.

去棒球场。

简短的英语笑话带翻译:骗子

A:Hey, dad, how can you tell when someone’s lying?

A:嗨,爸爸,怎样才能知道谁说谎了?

do I know? Go ask an expert.

爸爸:我怎么知道,去问专家。

A:Ok. Hey, mom...

A:哦,妈妈~~

B: I’d like to join your liars club.

B:我想加入你的说谎者俱乐部。

C: Ok, you’ll need to fill out an application.

C:好的,你需要填一张申请表。

C: Occupation?

C:职业

B:Mule skinner.

B: 骡夫

C: Age?

C:年龄?

B:20

B:20

C:Weight?

C:体重?

B:92 LBS.

B:92磅

C:Hey, what the heck...Go on in and make yourself at home!

C:哦,见鬼,你可以随时回家了。

简短的英语笑话带翻译:一边吸一边玩

A: I hear *** okeless tobacco has been banned

A:我听说无烟菸草已经被禁止了。

B:Great!That’ll really helped clumsy

B:太好了!正好帮助了那些笨人。

A:How is that?

A:怎么说?

B:He can’t chew and play at the same time, anyway.

B:无论如何,他总算不能一边吸一边玩了。

简短的英语笑话带翻译:失望不快

A:Doom and gloom,gloom and doom,all you write is doom and gloom

A:失望不快、失望不快,都是失望不快。

A:Just once why can’t you write about gloom and joy?

A:为什么不写愉快不快呢?

B:Because they don’t rhyme

B:因为这样比较押韵。

简短英语笑话篇翻译(英语笑话简单带翻译)插图

英语小笑话带翻译短

英语小笑话带翻译短

   英语小笑话带翻译短一:

Do You Know My Work? One night a hotel caught fire, and the people who were staying in it ran out in their night clothes.   Two men stood outside and looked at the fire.   “Before I came out,” said one,“I ran into some of the rooms and found a lot of money. People don't think of money when they're afraid. When anyone leaves paper money in a fire, the fire burns it. So I took all the bills that I could find.No one will be poorer because I took them.”   “You don't know my work,” said the other.   “What is your work?”   “I'm a policeman.   “Oh!” cried the first man. He thought quickly and said,“And do you know my work?”“No,”said the policeman.   “I'm a writer. I'm always telling stories about things that never happened.”

你知道我是干什么的吗?   一天晚上,一家旅馆失火,住在这家旅馆里的人穿着睡 衣就跑了出来。   两个人站在外面,看着大火。   “在我出来之前,”其中一个说:“我跑进一些房间,找到了一大笔钱。人在恐惧中是不会想到钱的。如果有人把纸币留在火里,火就会把它烧成灰烬。所以我把我所能找到的钞票都拿走了。没有人会因为我拿走它们而变得更穷。”   “你不知道我是干什么的。”另一个说。   “你是干什么的?”   “我是警察。”   “噢!”第一个人喊了一声。他灵机一动,说:“那你知道我是干什么的?”“不知道。”警察说。   “我是个作家。我总是爱编一些从未发生过的.故事。”

英语小笑话带翻译短二:

Wife talking to her husband,who reads newspaper all day: I wish I were a newspaper so I'll be in your hands all day.

Husband: I wish that too, so I could change you daily

妻子和丈夫谈话,他一天到晚总是看报纸,妻子抱怨说:我要是报纸就好了,那样我就可以天天在你手里了。

丈夫说我也希望那样,那样我就可以每天换一个了。

NOTE

I wish I were ....是虚拟语气的说法,表示希望发生但不会发生的。

英语小笑话带翻译短三:

The Crowded Store

It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store's opening time, in front of the store.

A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curse. On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, and knocked around a bit, and then thrown at the end of the line again.

As he got up, he said to the person at the end of the line,” That does it! If they hit me one more time, I won't open the store!"

一天,一个商店降价大甩卖。人们在开店之前就排在了商店门前,排成了很长的一队。一个身材矮小的人推挤着想到队伍的前面,但被推了回来,而且被咒骂着插队。那个人又一次努力往前挤, 但是又被挤到了最后面,而且下巴被重重的碰了几下,他对最后一个人说:“如果他们再次这样对我,我就不去开商店门了!!!”

;

简短的英语笑话带翻译摘抄?

笑话***jokes***往往是指能引人发笑的谈话或故事。作为文体,篇幅短小,故事情节简单而巧妙,往往出人意料,取得令人捧腹的艺术效果。我整理了简短的英语笑话带翻译,欢迎阅读!

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇一

Wow!That's a Big One!

哇!那个真是大得吓人

One day a tourist walked into a Texas tavern and ordered a shot of whiskey. The bartender puta big tumbler full of whiskey in front of him.

某一天一位观光客走进一家德州酒店点了一杯威士忌,酒保竞给他一大杯的酒。

"What's this?" asked the tourist.

“这是什么呢?”观光客问道。

"Why, it's a shot of whiskey! Don't you know that everything is big in Texas?"

“怎么了,那是你点的酒,难道你不知道德州每样东西都大得吓人。”

Then, an armadillo ran past the door.

那时刚好有一只穿山甲跑过酒店门口。

“What was that?" asked the tourist.

“那是什么东西?’观光客又问。

"Why, that was a Texas cockroach. "

“哦,那是只德州蟑螂!”

By this time, the whiskey had gone to the tourist's bladder as well as his head,

喝了酒,观光客感到腹胀头昏,

and he asked the location of the bathroom.

他问哪里有洗手间。

The bartender directed him to go down the hall and to the right,

酒保告诉他下楼后右转,

but the tourist turned left instead and fell into the swimming pool.

但观光客却向左转,跌落在酒店的游泳池中。

The bartender heard the splash and went to investigate.

酒保听到水声跑出去看个究竟。

As he put his head in the door, he heard the tourist cry. "Don't flush the toilet ! "

刚把头伸进门就听到观光客大叫,“不要按动马桶冲水哟!

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇二

不费吹灰之力!

There were four passengers in the *** all aircraft as it sputtered over the Andes; a busines *** an, an inventor, a priest and a laid -back budget traveller.

一架正飞越安第斯山脉的小飞机上坐着四名乘客:一名商人,一名发明家,一位神父和一个靠预算过日子、看起来懒懒散散的旅行者。

Suddenly the pilot entered the cabin and told them the horrible news: "Gentlemen, the plane is going down. I'm going to try to crash-land it, but you must all jump. "

突然,驾驶员走进舱告诉他们可怕的讯息:“各位先生,这架飞机正失控下降中,我要设法迫降,但你们必须先跳下飞机。”

Naturally, the men were horrified and even more so when they discovered that there were only three parachutes.

当然,那几个人都吓得目瞪口呆,尤其是当他们发现只有三个降落伞可以使用时,更是心惊胆战。

The busines *** an said, "Sirs, I employ thousands of people. Their lives and those of their families depend on me. I think you'll agree that I must survive. " He promptly put on a parachute and leaped.

那名商人说道:“各位先生,我雇用好几千名员工,他们都要靠我养家活口,我想你们都同意我必须活着回去。”说着他便穿上一具降落伞跳出飞机去。

The inventor rose, already adjusting the straps. "I'm the *** artest man in the world. My inventions have transformed the lives of millions. There’s no telling how much good I may yet do. Goodbye. " And he, too, jumped from the plane.

接着发明家站了起来,调整了肩带说道:“我是世界上最聪明的人,我的发明改变了成千上万人的生活。我还会对大众造多少福难以估计。再见了,各位!”他也跟着跳出机舱。

The priest was se.rene, and interrupted his prayers to speak to the traveller. "I am a rnan of God, my son; I have no fear of death. Take the last parachute and save your life. "

神父心平气和,中断祷告,对旅行者说道:“小伙子,我是信奉上帝的人,我对死并不畏惧,剩下的降落伞你就拿去用,逃命去吧!”

"Hey, it,s cool, Father. There’ re still two parachutes left. The *** artest man in tne world just jumped out of the plane wearing my backpack. "

“嘿,神父,真是太棒了!我们还有两个降落伞。那个自称世界上最聪明的人背了我的背包跳出去了。”

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇三

No Fooling!

不要瞎混!

"Please be gentle with me, darling," said the bride on her wedding night, "I'm a virgin. "

“请对我温柔一些,亲爱的!”新婚之夜新娘对新郎说道。“我是个处女。”

"You're a virgin?" exclaimed her hu *** and with surprise.

“你是个处女?”她丈夫吃惊地叫道,

"But you've been married three times. "

“可是你已经结过三次婚了啊。”

"That's true. dear; but my first hu *** and was an artist and he just wanted to look at my body;

“没错,亲爱的,可是我的第一任丈夫是位艺术家,他只想看我的身体。

my second hu *** and was in advertising, and he would only tell me how great it was going to be;

我的第二任丈夫从事广告业,而他只是告诉我那件事会有多美好。

and my third hu *** and was a lawyer, and would always say, ”I'll get back to you next week. "

我的第三任丈夫是位律师,他总是说:“下星期我就回来看你。”

英语短笑话带翻译

民间笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。我精心收集了英语短笑话带翻译,供大家欣赏学习!

英语短笑话带翻译篇1

Liar,Liar

骗子,骗子

A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband wasmissing.

老婆与隔壁邻居到警察局报案 说她的老公失踪了。

The policeman asked her for a description.

警察要求,她形容一下。

She said,"He is 35 years old,6 feet 4 inches,has dark eyes,dark wavy hair,an athleticbuild,weighs 185 pounds,is soft-spoken ,and is good to the children."

她说:“他三十五岁,六尺四寸,黑眼睛,波浪状的深色头发;体格健壮,体重185磅,说话很轻,而且对小孩子很好。”

The next-door neighbor protested,

隔壁邻居期提出反驳说:

"Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches,chubby,bald,has a big mouth,and is mean to your children."

“你老公五尺四寸,胖嘟嘟 的,秃头,有一个太嘴巴,而且对你的小孩很刻薄。”

The wife replied,"Yes,but who wants"THIS KIND OF STUFF"back?"

老婆回答说:“你说对了,可是谁会要 这种没用的废物 回来呀?”

英语短笑话带翻译篇2

A Henpecked Husband

怕老婆的老公

A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself.

有一位怕老婆的老公接受心理治疗师的建议要坚持自己的主见。

"You don't have to let your wife bully you,"he said."Go home and show her you are the boss ."

他说:“你不必让你的老婆像恶霸一样欺侮你。回家去让她知道你才是老大。”

The husband decided to take the doctor's asvice.He went home,slammed the door,shook his first in his wife's face,and growled,"

这位老公决定接受医生的劝告。他回到家,用力啪答一声关上门,在他老婆的面前:挥舞着拳头,并且大声咆哮说:

From now on you are talking orders from me.

“从现在起,你得乖乖听我的命令。

I want my supper right now,and when you get it on the table ,go upstairs and lay out my clothes.

我现在就要吃晚餐,当你把它弄好放在餐桌上的时候,到楼上去把我的衣服摆放好。

Tonight I am going out with my friends.

今天晚上我要和我的。朋友外出,

You are going to stay at home where you belong.

你给我乖乖待在家里不许乱跑。

Another thing,you know who is going to tie bow tie?"

另外还有一件事情,你知道谁要替我打蝴蝶结领结吗?”

I certainlydo,"screamed the wife."The Undertaker."

老婆尖叫着说:“我当然知道。是收尸的人。”

英语短笑话带翻译篇3

向你的烦恼说再见

A Jew, an Indian and a black were lined up to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

一位犹太人、一位印第安人和一位黑人列队进入天国之门。

Said the Jew to St. Peter, 66 Frankly, I'm rather surprised to be here. All my life Christians havedespised and reviled me. "

那位犹太人对圣彼得说:“坦白讲,能到这里让我蛮惊讶的,我一辈子一直都受到__的轻视和侮辱。”

"That's a great sorrow to us,"said St. Peter, "but you won't find that kind of prejudice here.Here, all are truly equal.Just spell God and you may enter."

“我们实在感到非常遗憾,”圣彼得说,“但我们这里没有那样的偏见,这里每个人都完全平等,只要拼出God这个词你就能进入天堂。”

the Jew truly spell out god and was swept through the gates.Next,the Indian came forward andsaid,"St.Peter,all my life I suffered from poverty and discrimination,and could only live in areservation.Will I truly be free here?"

那名犹太人正确地拼出God后,被招入门内。接着印第安人走向前说道“圣彼得,我一辈子饱受贫穷和种族歧视的打击,而且只能住在居留地内,我在这里能得到真正的自由吗?”

"My son, your troubles are over.Just spell the word God you will be free as a bird. "

“小兄弟,你的烦恼已经结束了,只要拼出God这个词,你就能像小鸟一样自由自在。”

The Indian obliged and he, too, entered the Heavenly Kingdom.

印第安人照着做,不久也被引入天堂。

Next,the black man strode forward."St. Peter," he said, "all my life people looked down on meand treated me unfairly.That won't happen here, will it?"

接着那名黑人跨步向前,“圣彼得,”他说道,“一辈子人们都瞧不起我,不公平对待我,在这里那些事不会发生吧!”

"Of course not, my boy. We don't do that kind of thing here.Just spell" onomatopoeia "and theKingdom of Heaven is yours "

“当然不会,我的弟兄,我们不会做那样的事,只要拼出onomatopoeia这个词,天堂之国就是你的了!”

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短的英语笑话带翻译

短的英语笑话带翻译

   短的英语笑话带翻译一:

Walking up to a department store's fabric(织物,布) counter, the pretty girl said, "I would like to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?""Only one kiss per yard," replied the male clerk with asmirk(假笑,傻笑) . "That's fine," said the girl. "I'll take ten yards."With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, then teasingly(故意使人烦恼地) held it out.The girl snapped up the package, pointed to the old geezer(老家伙) standing beside her, and smiled, "Grandpa will pay the bill."

一个漂亮的女孩走到百货公司的布料柜台,说:“我想要买这种料子来做一条新裙子,多少钱?”“每码只需要一个吻。”男售货员说着,带着奸笑的表情“很好,”女孩说,“我要十码。”带着期待的.表情,售货员很快地量好了布料,包裹好,一脸奸笑地送了过来。女孩很快收起了包裹,微笑着指向了一个站在她身边的老头:“爷爷给我付账。”

短的英语笑话带翻译二:

When a student failed to solve a math problem in class, he expressed his regret to his teacher. "I remember solving the problem in my dream last night, but for the time being I've forgotten it . What can that mean?""It means that you are more intelligent in dreams than when you are awake," the teacher explained.

一名学生在班上没有做出老师的教学题,他感到很遗憾,对老师解释说:“我记得昨天夜里做梦对这道题解对了,但现在一时想不起来了。这说明什么?”“这说明你做梦的时候比你醒着的时候更聪明”。老师解释说。

短的英语笑话带翻译三:

A story around campus has it that a student once sent a telegram to his parents reading: "Mom - flunked(不及格,失败) all courses. Kicked out of school. Prepare Pop."Two days later he received a response: "Pop prepared. Prepare yourself."

校园里流传着这样的故事:一个学生一次给父母拍了一份电报,上面写着:“妈妈,我所有功课都不及格,被学校开除。让爸爸做好准备。”两天以后,他收到了回电:“爸爸已准备好。你自己做好准备吧!”

;

英语笑话带翻译简短的

笑话是幽默的一个属概念 ,具有幽默的一切特征。笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。我整理了简短的英语笑话带翻译,欢迎阅读!

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇一

When they’re together, my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem. one Saturday, I put my foot down. “All right, you two,” I said sternly. “No screaming , grabbing, whining, hitting, teasing, tattling, breaking toys, scratching or fighting.”

As I turned to leave, I heard my son say, “C’mon, Steven, let’s get dirty . ”

我五岁的儿子和他的表弟在一起的时候,总要招来大乱。一个星期六,我开始抗议了。“好啦,你们两个,”我严厉地说,“不许叫喊,不许乱拿,不许哭闹,不许乱敲,不许取笑,不许扯淡,不许弄坏玩具,不许乱抓,不许打架。” 我刚转身要走,就听我儿子说:“来,斯蒂文,我们来把自己弄脏吧。”

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇二

It’s Good to Admit a Fault

John is not a “good” student. He always sleeps in the class. Today he sleeps again.

“John!” Teacher says angrily.

“What? What’s wrong?” John is awaken.

“Why do you make a face? It’s classroom. Look! Everyone is laughing.” Teacher says.

“No one is laughing.” The others murmured.

“No, it’s not me. I was not making a face. I was sleeping.” John fells upset.

“Um. Not bad. You can admit your fault. You are still a good boy.” Teacher is satisfied with it.

认错

约翰并不是个“好”学生。他总是在上课的时候睡觉。今天他又睡着了。

“约翰!”老师生气地喊他。

“什么?出什么事了?”约翰醒了。

“你为什么要做鬼脸?这是教室!看看!同学们都在笑!”老师生气地说。

“没有人在笑呀。”其他同学笑声地嘀咕。

“不,不是我。我没有做鬼脸。刚才我睡着了。”约翰感到不安。

“嗯,还不错。你承认自己的错误,还是给好孩子”老师为此感到满意。

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇三

Mark is a good boy,but he is not very clean.His face and hands always very dirty.

One day,Mark goes to school.His teacher looks at him and says:"Mark,I know what you eat today.""What?"Mark asks. "Eggs.your face and your mouth tell me that."

"No."Mark says,"not today,but the day before yesterday."

翻译:马克是个好男孩,但他不是很干净。他的手和脸总是很脏。

一天,马克去学校。他的老师看着他,说:“我知道你今天早上吃了什么。”“什么?”马克问道。“鸡蛋。你的脸和嘴告诉了我。”“不,”马克说,“不是今天,是前天。”

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