笑话哦本文目录一览：
- 1、短的英语笑话带翻译
- 2、英语幽默短笑话10篇
- 3、英语短篇笑话
- 4、英语短笑话带翻译
- 5、英语小笑话
- 6、英语笑话带翻译简短的
短的英语笑话带翻译
短的英语笑话带翻译
短的英语笑话带翻译一：
Walking up to a department store's fabric(织物，布) counter, the pretty girl said, "I would like to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?""Only one kiss per yard," replied the male clerk with asmirk(假笑，傻笑) . "That's fine," said the girl. "I'll take ten yards."With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, then teasingly(故意使人烦恼地) held it out.The girl snapped up the package, pointed to the old geezer(老家伙) standing beside her, and smiled, "Grandpa will pay the bill."
一个漂亮的女孩走到百货公司的布料柜台，说：“我想要买这种料子来做一条新裙子，多少钱?”“每码只需要一个吻。”男售货员说着，带着奸笑的表情“很好，”女孩说，“我要十码。”带着期待的.表情，售货员很快地量好了布料，包裹好，一脸奸笑地送了过来。女孩很快收起了包裹，微笑着指向了一个站在她身边的老头：“爷爷给我付账。”
短的英语笑话带翻译二：
When a student failed to solve a math problem in class, he expressed his regret to his teacher. "I remember solving the problem in my dream last night, but for the time being I've forgotten it . What can that mean?""It means that you are more intelligent in dreams than when you are awake," the teacher explained.
一名学生在班上没有做出老师的教学题，他感到很遗憾，对老师解释说：“我记得昨天夜里做梦对这道题解对了，但现在一时想不起来了。这说明什么?”“这说明你做梦的时候比你醒着的时候更聪明”。老师解释说。
短的英语笑话带翻译三：
A story around campus has it that a student once sent a telegram to his parents reading: "Mom - flunked(不及格，失败) all courses. Kicked out of school. Prepare Pop."Two days later he received a response: "Pop prepared. Prepare yourself."
校园里流传着这样的故事：一个学生一次给父母拍了一份电报，上面写着：“妈妈，我所有功课都不及格，被学校开除。让爸爸做好准备。”两天以后，他收到了回电：“爸爸已准备好。你自己做好准备吧!”
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英语幽默短笑话10篇
在繁忙的学习工作中，适时读一些幽默笑话，放松自己，劳逸结合十分重要。下面是我整理的10个英语幽默短笑话，希望大家喜欢!
英语幽默短笑话1.
Mike:Mum,I want to watch TV.
Mum:There is no electricity tonight.
Mike:Then let's watch TVwith a candie on.
迈克：妈妈，我想看电视。
妈妈：今晚停电了。
迈克：那我们就点着蜡烛看吧。
英语幽默短笑话2.
The Fish Net
"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?"
"A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.
"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安?" 老师发问道。
"把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。" 小女孩回答道。
英语幽默短笑话3.
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
英语幽默短笑话4.
I've Just Bitten My Tongue
"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother.
"Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?"
"Cause I've just bitten my tongue! "
我刚咬破自己的舌头
“我们有毒吗?”一个年幼的蛇问它的母亲。
“是的，亲爱的，”她回答说，“你问这个干什么?”
“因为我刚刚咬破自己的舌头。”
英语幽默短笑话5.
It was rush hour and I was dashing to a train in New York City's Grand Central Terminal - As I neared the gate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing on the smooth marble floor and slid onto her back. Her momentum carried her close to my shoes. Before I could help her, however, she had scrambled up. Gaining her composure, she winked at me and said, "Do you always have beautiful women failing at your feet?"
上下班高峰期，我匆匆奔向纽约豪华中心站去赶一趟火车。接近门口，一位肥胖的中年妇女从后面冲过来，没想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了脚，仰面滑倒了。她的惯性使她接近了我的脚。我正准备扶她，她却自己爬了起来。她镇定了一下，对我挤了一下眉，说道：“总是有漂亮女人拜倒在你脚下吗?”
英语幽默短笑话6.
-- My uncle has 1000 men under him.
-- He is really somebody. What does he do?
-- A maintenance man in a cemetery.
-- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。
-- 他真是一个大人物。干什么的?
-- 墓地守墓人。
英语幽默短笑话7.
Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.
At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."
一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久，到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。在银行柜台，银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票，看是否有假。
这种做法让老妇人很不耐烦，最后实在忍耐不住说：“相信我，先生，也请你相信这些钞票。这都是真正的美元，它们是从美国直接带来的。”
英语幽默短笑话8.
Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!
Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!
Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.
布朗夫人：哦，亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!
史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登 广告 啊!
布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。”
英语幽默短笑话9.
—Waiter, this lobster has only one claw.
-- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight.
-- Well, bring me the winner then.
-- 服务员， 这个龙虾只有一只爪。
-- 对不起，先生，这只肯定打过架了。
-- 哦， 那给我那个打赢的吧。
英语幽默短笑话10.
A bit of advice for those about to retire. If you are only 65, never move to a retirement community. Everybody else is n their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be moved, lifted or loaded, they yell,"Get the kid."
这里想对将要退休者提一点忠告。如果你只有65岁的话，
千万别进退休社区。因为那里人人都七八十岁或者八九十岁了。每当要搬东西，抬东西或者装东西时，他们就叫喊，“让小的干吧。”
英语幽默短笑话10篇相关 文章 ：
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2. 爆笑英语冷笑话10篇
3. 最搞笑的英语小笑话十则
4. 10个英语幽默短笑话
5. 英语幽默笑话短
英语短篇笑话
英语短篇笑话
看英语笑话，开心学习英语!
1、
Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!
Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!
Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.
布朗夫人：哦，
亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!
史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊!
布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。”
2、
The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled. His father knew it, but his grandma doted on(溺爱，宠爱) him. He hardly left her side. And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum(乱发脾气) . Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door. "Was school all right?" she asked, "Did you get along all right? Did you cry?""Cry?" John asked. "No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!"
六岁的约翰娇生惯养。他的父亲知道这一点，可他的祖父母仍然宠着他。这孩子几乎寸步不离他的祖母。他想要什么不是哭，就是闹。他第一天上学才离开祖母的.怀抱。约翰放学了，他奶奶在门口接他并问道：“学校怎么样?你过的好吗?哭了没有?”“哭?”约翰问，“不，我没哭，可老师哭了。”
3、
The patient is adamant. "Doc, I need a liver transplant, a kidney transplant, a heart transplant, a cornea transplant, a spleen transplant, a pancreas trans. . ." "What makes you think you need all these?" Well, replied the patient, "My boss said if I wanted to keep my job I needed to get reorganized."
这个病人显得很坚决。“医生，我需要做肝脏移植、肾脏移植、心脏移植、角膜移植、脾脏移植、胰腺移植和……” “你为什么认为你需要做这么多移植手术?”病人回答：“哦，是这样，我的老板说如果我这个人不重新组装的话，就别想保住我的工作!”
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英语短笑话带翻译
民间笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。我精心收集了英语短笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!
英语短笑话带翻译篇1
Liar,Liar
骗子，骗子
A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband wasmissing.
老婆与隔壁邻居到警察局报案 说她的老公失踪了。
The policeman asked her for a description.
警察要求，她形容一下。
She said,"He is 35 years old,6 feet 4 inches,has dark eyes,dark wavy hair,an athleticbuild,weighs 185 pounds,is soft-spoken ,and is good to the children."
她说：“他三十五岁，六尺四寸，黑眼睛，波浪状的深色头发;体格健壮，体重185磅，说话很轻，而且对小孩子很好。”
The next-door neighbor protested,
隔壁邻居期提出反驳说：
"Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches,chubby,bald,has a big mouth,and is mean to your children."
“你老公五尺四寸，胖嘟嘟 的，秃头，有一个太嘴巴，而且对你的小孩很刻薄。”
The wife replied,"Yes,but who wants"THIS KIND OF STUFF"back?"
老婆回答说：“你说对了，可是谁会要 这种没用的废物 回来呀?”
英语短笑话带翻译篇2
A Henpecked Husband
怕老婆的老公
A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself.
有一位怕老婆的老公接受心理治疗师的建议要坚持自己的主见。
"You don't have to let your wife bully you,"he said."Go home and show her you are the boss ."
他说：“你不必让你的老婆像恶霸一样欺侮你。回家去让她知道你才是老大。”
The husband decided to take the doctor's asvice.He went home,slammed the door,shook his first in his wife's face,and growled,"
这位老公决定接受医生的劝告。他回到家，用力啪答一声关上门，在他老婆的面前：挥舞着拳头，并且大声咆哮说：
From now on you are talking orders from me.
“从现在起，你得乖乖听我的命令。
I want my supper right now,and when you get it on the table ,go upstairs and lay out my clothes.
我现在就要吃晚餐，当你把它弄好放在餐桌上的时候，到楼上去把我的衣服摆放好。
Tonight I am going out with my friends.
今天晚上我要和我的。朋友外出，
You are going to stay at home where you belong.
你给我乖乖待在家里不许乱跑。
Another thing,you know who is going to tie bow tie?"
另外还有一件事情，你知道谁要替我打蝴蝶结领结吗?”
I certainlydo,"screamed the wife."The Undertaker."
老婆尖叫着说:“我当然知道。是收尸的人。”
英语短笑话带翻译篇3
向你的烦恼说再见
A Jew, an Indian and a black were lined up to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.
一位犹太人、一位印第安人和一位黑人列队进入天国之门。
Said the Jew to St. Peter, 66 Frankly, I'm rather surprised to be here. All my life Christians havedespised and reviled me. "
那位犹太人对圣彼得说：“坦白讲，能到这里让我蛮惊讶的，我一辈子一直都受到__的轻视和侮辱。”
"That's a great sorrow to us,"said St. Peter, "but you won't find that kind of prejudice here.Here, all are truly equal.Just spell God and you may enter."
“我们实在感到非常遗憾，”圣彼得说，“但我们这里没有那样的偏见，这里每个人都完全平等，只要拼出God这个词你就能进入天堂。”
the Jew truly spell out god and was swept through the gates.Next,the Indian came forward andsaid,"St.Peter,all my life I suffered from poverty and discrimination,and could only live in areservation.Will I truly be free here?"
那名犹太人正确地拼出God后，被招入门内。接着印第安人走向前说道“圣彼得，我一辈子饱受贫穷和种族歧视的打击，而且只能住在居留地内，我在这里能得到真正的自由吗?”
"My son, your troubles are over.Just spell the word God you will be free as a bird. "
“小兄弟，你的烦恼已经结束了，只要拼出God这个词，你就能像小鸟一样自由自在。”
The Indian obliged and he, too, entered the Heavenly Kingdom.
印第安人照着做，不久也被引入天堂。
Next,the black man strode forward."St. Peter," he said, "all my life people looked down on meand treated me unfairly.That won't happen here, will it?"
接着那名黑人跨步向前，“圣彼得，”他说道，“一辈子人们都瞧不起我，不公平对待我，在这里那些事不会发生吧!”
"Of course not, my boy. We don't do that kind of thing here.Just spell" onomatopoeia "and theKingdom of Heaven is yours "
“当然不会，我的弟兄，我们不会做那样的事，只要拼出onomatopoeia这个词，天堂之国就是你的了!”
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英语小笑话
He Won
Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他赢了
汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？
约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？
约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。
I Have his Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”
“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
A Good Boy
Little robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！”
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪？” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。
英语笑话带翻译简短的
笑话是幽默的一个属概念 ,具有幽默的一切特征。笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。我整理了简短的英语笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!
简短的英语笑话带翻译篇一
When they’re together, my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem. one Saturday, I put my foot down. “All right, you two,” I said sternly. “No screaming , grabbing, whining, hitting, teasing, tattling, breaking toys, scratching or fighting.”
As I turned to leave, I heard my son say, “C’mon, Steven, let’s get dirty . ”
我五岁的儿子和他的表弟在一起的时候，总要招来大乱。一个星期六，我开始抗议了。“好啦，你们两个，”我严厉地说，“不许叫喊，不许乱拿，不许哭闹，不许乱敲，不许取笑，不许扯淡，不许弄坏玩具，不许乱抓，不许打架。” 我刚转身要走，就听我儿子说：“来，斯蒂文，我们来把自己弄脏吧。”
简短的英语笑话带翻译篇二
It’s Good to Admit a Fault
John is not a “good” student. He always sleeps in the class. Today he sleeps again.
“John!” Teacher says angrily.
“What? What’s wrong?” John is awaken.
“Why do you make a face? It’s classroom. Look! Everyone is laughing.” Teacher says.
“No one is laughing.” The others murmured.
“No, it’s not me. I was not making a face. I was sleeping.” John fells upset.
“Um. Not bad. You can admit your fault. You are still a good boy.” Teacher is satisfied with it.
认错
约翰并不是个“好”学生。他总是在上课的时候睡觉。今天他又睡着了。
“约翰!”老师生气地喊他。
“什么?出什么事了?”约翰醒了。
“你为什么要做鬼脸?这是教室!看看!同学们都在笑!”老师生气地说。
“没有人在笑呀。”其他同学笑声地嘀咕。
“不，不是我。我没有做鬼脸。刚才我睡着了。”约翰感到不安。
“嗯，还不错。你承认自己的错误，还是给好孩子”老师为此感到满意。
简短的英语笑话带翻译篇三
Mark is a good boy,but he is not very clean.His face and hands always very dirty.
One day,Mark goes to school.His teacher looks at him and says:"Mark,I know what you eat today.""What?"Mark asks. "Eggs.your face and your mouth tell me that."
"No."Mark says,"not today,but the day before yesterday."
翻译：马克是个好男孩，但他不是很干净。他的手和脸总是很脏。
一天，马克去学校。他的老师看着他，说：“我知道你今天早上吃了什么。”“什么?”马克问道。“鸡蛋。你的脸和嘴告诉了我。”“不，”马克说，“不是今天，是前天。”
