笑话哦
很搞笑的冷笑话哦 !

英语笑话翻译50字(英语笑话翻译50字怎么写)

本文目录一览:

短的英语笑话带翻译

短的英语笑话带翻译

   短的英语笑话带翻译一:

Walking up to a department store's fabric(织物,布) counter, the pretty girl said, "I would like to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?""Only one kiss per yard," replied the male clerk with asmirk(假笑,傻笑) . "That's fine," said the girl. "I'll take ten yards."With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, then teasingly(故意使人烦恼地) held it out.The girl snapped up the package, pointed to the old geezer(老家伙) standing beside her, and smiled, "Grandpa will pay the bill."

一个漂亮的女孩走到百货公司的布料柜台,说:“我想要买这种料子来做一条新裙子,多少钱?”“每码只需要一个吻。”男售货员说着,带着奸笑的表情“很好,”女孩说,“我要十码。”带着期待的.表情,售货员很快地量好了布料,包裹好,一脸奸笑地送了过来。女孩很快收起了包裹,微笑着指向了一个站在她身边的老头:“爷爷给我付账。”

短的英语笑话带翻译二:

When a student failed to solve a math problem in class, he expressed his regret to his teacher. "I remember solving the problem in my dream last night, but for the time being I've forgotten it . What can that mean?""It means that you are more intelligent in dreams than when you are awake," the teacher explained.

一名学生在班上没有做出老师的教学题,他感到很遗憾,对老师解释说:“我记得昨天夜里做梦对这道题解对了,但现在一时想不起来了。这说明什么?”“这说明你做梦的时候比你醒着的时候更聪明”。老师解释说。

短的英语笑话带翻译三:

A story around campus has it that a student once sent a telegram to his parents reading: "Mom - flunked(不及格,失败) all courses. Kicked out of school. Prepare Pop."Two days later he received a response: "Pop prepared. Prepare yourself."

校园里流传着这样的故事:一个学生一次给父母拍了一份电报,上面写着:“妈妈,我所有功课都不及格,被学校开除。让爸爸做好准备。”两天以后,他收到了回电:“爸爸已准备好。你自己做好准备吧!”

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我要5个搞笑大约50字左右的英语带翻译的笑话

A 17-year-old boy longed for the cycling competition. He had trained hard in his cycling club. The day came when he was to take part in the first real race. His parents went with him to the starting line, giving him the last-minute advice. Suddenly, the starting signal was given. His mother shouted, "Boy, be careful! Don't go to too fast!"

最后的忠告

一个17岁的男孩子一直盼望着参加自行车比赛,为此他一直在自行车俱乐部刻苦训练。第一次参加比赛的日子终于来了。他的父母和他一起来到起点,准备给他最后的忠告。突然,出发信号给了,他的妈妈喊道:“孩子,小心!别骑得太快了!”

The doctor lives downstairs

"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me."

He surveyed her from head to foot. "Madam," he said at length, "I've just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty pounds. Second, your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, I'm an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."

医生住在楼下。

“医生”她冲进屋后大声说道,“我想让你坦率地说我到底得了什么病。”

他从头到脚打量打量她,然后大声说:“太太,我有三件事要对你说。第一,您的体重需要减少大约50磅;第二,如果您要用上十分之一的胭脂和口红,您的美貌将会改变。第三,我是一位画家——医生住在楼下。” 没事偷着乐 职业赌徒 During the Great Depression, there was a man who walked into a bar one day. He went up to the bartender and said, "Bartender, I'd like to buy the house a round of drinks."

The bartender said, "That's fine, but we're in the middle of the Depression, so I'll need to see some money first."

The guy pulled out a huge wad of bills and set them on the bar. The bartender can't believe what he's seeing. "Where did you get all that money?" asked the bartender.

"I'm a professional gambler," replied the man.

The bartender said, "There's no such thing! I mean, your odds are fifty-fifty at best, right?"

"Well, I only bet on sure things," said the guy.

"Like what?" asked the bartender.

"Well, for example, I'll bet you fifty dollars that I can bite my right eye," he said.

The bartender thought about it. "Okay," he said.

So, the guy pulled out his false right eye and bit it. "Aw, you screwed me," said the bartender, and paid the guy his $50.

"I'll give you another chance. I'll bet you another fifty dollars that I can bite my left eye," said the stranger.

The bartender thought again and said, "Well, I know you're not blind, I mean, I watched you walk in here. I'll take that bet." So, the guy pulled out his false teeth and bit his left eye.

"Aw, you screwed me again!" protested the bartender.

"That's how I win so much money, bartender. I'll just take a bottle of your best scotch in lieu of the fifty dollars," said the man.

With that, the guy went to the back room and spent the better part of the night playing cards with some of the locals.

After many hours of drinking and card playing, he stumbled up to the bar. Drunk as a skunk, he said, "Bartender, I'll give you one last chance. I'll bet you five hundred dollars that I can stand on this bar on one foot and piss into that whiskey bottle on that shelf behind you without spilling a drop."

The bartender once again pondered the bet. The guy couldn't even stand up straight on two feet, much less one. "Okay, you're on," he said.

The guy climbed up on the bar, stood on one leg, and began pissing all over the place. He hit the bar, the bartender, himself, but not a drop made it into the whiskey bottle.

The bartender was ecstatic. Laughing, the bartender said, "Hey pal, you owe me five hundred dollars!"

The guy climbed down off the bar and said, "That's okay. I just bet each of the guys in the card room a thousand bucks each that I could piss all over you and the bar and still make you laugh!"

经济大萧条时期。有一天,有个男人走进一家酒吧,对调酒师说:“调酒师,我想为在座的所有客人每人买一杯酒。”

调酒师说:“当然可以,不过现在正处于经济萧条时期,我需要先看到你带有足够的现金才行。”

那人从口袋里掏出一大迭钞票放到吧台上。调酒师简直不敢相信自己的眼睛,就问:“你这些钱都是从哪儿弄来的?”

“我是一个职业赌徒。”男士回答。

“这不可能。我的意思是,在赌场你赢的机会最多也就五五开,不是吗?” 调酒师说。

“那当然,不过我只打我必赢的赌。”男士说。

“比如呢?”调酒师问道。

“唔,例如,我可以和你赌50美元:我能够用自己的牙咬到自己的右眼睛。”他说。

调酒师想了一下,就说:“那就来吧!”

于是,那个人将他右边的假眼抠了出来,用嘴咬了一下。

调酒师说声“靠!我上当了!” ,就给了他50美元。

那陌生人又说道:“我会再给你一次机会的。我再和你赌50美元:我可以用我的牙咬到我的左眼。”

调酒师想了想说道:“哼!你又不是盲人,我的意思是说,我可是看着你走进这个酒吧的。这一把我和你赌定了!”

话刚出口,那家伙就从嘴里一把将假牙掰了下来,咬了左眼睛一下。

“靠!我又上当了!”调酒师几乎是抗议地叫出声来。

“这就是我赢了这么多钱的办法,小伙子!不过这次你也不用给我50元了,我只拿走一瓶威士忌就算了!”那人说道。

那个人拿了酒,就来到酒吧的后房,整个晚上的大部分时间都在和当地人打牌。

边喝边玩好几个小时之后,那个人又摇摇晃晃地来到吧台前,醉醺醺的样子,都快站不住了,他对调酒师说:“小伙子,我再给你最后一个机会。我和你赌500美元:我可以用一只脚站在这张吧台上撒尿,我能够把尿射到你身后酒架上的那个空瓶子里,而且保证不洒一滴到瓶子外边。”

调酒师再一次认真想了想:这家伙现在就是用两只脚都站不直,更别说用一条腿了……于是说:“好!那你就开始吧。”

只见那人爬到吧台上,来个金鸡独立,就开始撒尿。尿撒得到处都是:吧台上、调酒师身上和他自己身上,就是没有一滴尿到酒瓶里去。

小伙子简直开心死了,大笑着说:“老兄,这次你可欠我500块钱了。”

那家伙从吧台上爬了下来,说:“没问题。我刚和棋牌室里的每个人都赌了一千块钱,说我敢往你身上和吧台上撒尿,并且还能让你大笑!”

-第二则: The father never let children maomao during dinner always talk. Once when having a meal, father saw maomao wanted to speak, then say to him: "kid, what you want to say?""Dad, flies delicious?" Maomao, ask."No!" Father said, "why do you ask such a thing?""You just have a dish, you to swallow it down."毛毛的父亲从不让孩子在吃饭时时说话。一次吃饭时,父亲见到毛毛很想说话的样子,便对他说:“孩子,你想说什么?”“爸爸,苍蝇好吃吗?”毛毛问。“不!”父亲说,“你干嘛问这个?”“刚才您碟子里有一只,您把它咽下去了。” 第三则:英语笑话(三)

Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.

At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."

它们是从美国直接带来的

一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久,到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。在银行柜台,银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票,看是否有假。

这种做法让老妇人很不耐烦,最后实在忍耐不住说:“相信我,先生,也请你相信这些钞票。这都是真正的美元,它们是从美国直接带来的。”

英语笑话翻译50字(英语笑话翻译50字怎么写)插图

英语小笑话带翻译简短

笑话作为广大人民群众喜闻乐见的文学样式,自诞生之日起就凭借其辛辣独到的讽刺手法,夸张变形的艺术构思以及背反逻辑的情节设想等语体特点而得到作家青睐。我精心收集了简短英语小笑话带翻译,供大家欣赏学习!

简短英语小笑话带翻译篇1

财政学的一课

Smith was the manager of a construction company and was taking bids on a new project. Thefirst bidder was a Polish company, and their representative offered to do the job for $ 400,000. "That seems reasonable," said Smith. "Can you give me a breakdown on that?"

史密斯是一家建设公司的经理,他正负责一个新工程的招标案。第一位投标的是一家波兰公司,他们的代表出价四十万元接那个案子。“似乎很合理,”史密斯说。“你可不可以给我一张明细表呢?”

"Sure," said the Pole, " $200, 000 for labor and $ 200,000 for materials. "

“当然没问题,”波兰公司代表说道,“二十万元工资,二十万元材科费。”

Next to make a bid was the Standard American Construction Company, which bid $ 800,000.

下一个出标的是美国标准建设公司,他们以八十万元竞标。

"Hmm, that seems a bit high," said Smith. "What's the breakdown?"

“嗯,这个价钱似乎有些偏高,”史密斯说道。"你们有明细表吗?"

" $ 400,000 0n materials, $ 400,000 0n labor. "

“四十万元材料,四十万元工资。”

"I'll get back to you. "

“我以后再同你联系。”

Finally the representative of Cohen, Goldstein and Leibowitz entered Smith's office. " $ 1,200,000 is our bid," said the agent."

最后可翰•高斯坦•雷伯威兹公司的代表走进史密斯办公室。“一百二十万元是我们竞标的价码,”代表说道。

$11 200, 0001 That' s way out of line," exclaimed Smith. "Can you give me a breakdown onthat?"

“一百二十万元这个标高得太过分了,”史密斯叫道“你可以给我一张明细表吗?"

"No problem," replied the rep. " $400, 000 for me,$ 400 , 000 for you and $ 400,000 for thePolacks.

“没有问题,”代表回答道。“四十万元给我,四十万元给你,最后四十万元则给那家波兰佬开的公司。”

简短英语小笑话带翻译篇2

黑人英语

The black couple already had eight children, and Lula May was pregnantwith her ninth. Finallyshe convinced her husband to get a vasectomy.

一对黑人夫妇已有八个小孩,而鲁拉·梅又怀了第九个小孩,最后她说服了她先生去做男性绝育手术。

On the morning of the operation, she was surprised to see her husbandputting on a tuxedoand getting into a limousine for the short ride to thehospital.

手术的早晨,她惊讶地看见她老公穿着礼服,乘坐一辆礼车到不远的医院去。

"Say, honey, what's all this about?" asked Lula May.

"亲爱的,这是怎么一回事啊?鲁拉·梅问道。"

"Baby, if you gonna be important, you gotta look important.

"宝贝,如果你想当名大人物的话,就要让人一看就知道你很重要!"

简短英语小笑话带翻译篇3

向你的烦恼说再见

A Jew, an Indian and a black were lined up to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

一位犹太人、一位印第安人和一位黑人列队进入天国之门。

Said the Jew to St. Peter, 66 Frankly, I'm rather surprised to be here. All my life Christians havedespised and reviled me. "

那位犹太人对圣彼得说:“坦白讲,能到这里让我蛮惊讶的,我一辈子一直都受到__的轻视和侮辱。”

"That's a great sorrow to us,"said St. Peter, "but you won't find that kind of prejudice here.Here, all are truly equal.Just spell God and you may enter."

“我们实在感到非常遗憾,”圣彼得说,“但我们这里没有那样的偏见,这里每个人都完全平等,只要拼出God这个词你就能进入天堂。”

the Jew truly spell out god and was swept through the gates.Next,the Indian came forward andsaid,"St.Peter,all my life I suffered from poverty and discrimination,and could only live in areservation.Will I truly be free here?"

那名犹太人正确地拼出God后,被招入门内。接着印第安人走向前说道“圣彼得,我一辈子饱受贫穷和种族歧视的打击,而且只能住在居留地内,我在这里能得到真正的自由吗?”

"My son, your troubles are over.Just spell the word God you will be free as a bird. "

“小兄弟,你的烦恼已经结束了,只要拼出God这个词,你就能像小鸟一样自由自在。”

The Indian obliged and he, too, entered the Heavenly Kingdom.

印第安人照着做,不久也被引入天堂。

Next,the black man strode forward."St. Peter," he said, "all my life people looked down on meand treated me unfairly.That won't happen here, will it?"

接着那名黑人跨步向前,“圣彼得,”他说道,“一辈子人们都瞧不起我,不公平对待我,在这里那些事不会发生吧!”

"Of course not, my boy. We don't do that kind of thing here.Just spell" onomatopoeia "and theKingdom of Heaven is yours "

“当然不会,我的弟兄,我们不会做那样的事,只要拼出onomatopoeia这个词,天堂之国就是你的了!”

看了“简短英语小笑话带翻译”的人还看了:

1. 简单英语小笑话12篇

2. 英语爆笑笑话

3. 英语小笑话带翻译简短

4. 关于短小的英文小笑话带翻译

5. 英语小笑话带翻译

6. 关于英语小笑话带翻译简短

英语小笑话带翻译,50字左右

Good Boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents."What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly."Here are two cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱.

“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”

“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说.“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说.“再给你两分钱.可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”

“她是个卖糖果的.”

Two Tickets Please

A young man was in love with a girl.At one weekend,he invited

his girlfriend to the cinema.When they were at the ticket box,

the young man said to the ticket seller,"Two tickets,please."

When the ticket seller told him that all the tickets had sold

out,the disappointed young man said,"Then do you have any sur

tickets that can allow us to stand together?"

两张电影票

一个小伙子爱上了一位姑娘.周末,他请她看电影.来到售票处,

小伙子对售票员说:“请给两张票.”售票员告诉他所有的票都卖完了.

失望的年轻人说:“那么,您有两张可以让我们站在一起的附加票吗?”

What Grade

Kristin,my 17-year-old niece,had just gotten her driver's

license and offered to take her mom's car to the gas station.She

pulled up to the full-service pumps,and the attendant asked,"What

grade,miss?"

哪一级

我的十七岁的侄女,科里斯蒂,刚刚拿到驾照.她主动提出去加油

站给她妈妈的车加油.她把车开到昼夜服务的加油泵前.服务员问她:

“(加油加到)哪一级,小姐?”

英语小笑话带翻译短

英语小笑话带翻译短

   英语小笑话带翻译短一:

Do You Know My Work? One night a hotel caught fire, and the people who were staying in it ran out in their night clothes.   Two men stood outside and looked at the fire.   “Before I came out,” said one,“I ran into some of the rooms and found a lot of money. People don't think of money when they're afraid. When anyone leaves paper money in a fire, the fire burns it. So I took all the bills that I could find.No one will be poorer because I took them.”   “You don't know my work,” said the other.   “What is your work?”   “I'm a policeman.   “Oh!” cried the first man. He thought quickly and said,“And do you know my work?”“No,”said the policeman.   “I'm a writer. I'm always telling stories about things that never happened.”

你知道我是干什么的吗?   一天晚上,一家旅馆失火,住在这家旅馆里的人穿着睡 衣就跑了出来。   两个人站在外面,看着大火。   “在我出来之前,”其中一个说:“我跑进一些房间,找到了一大笔钱。人在恐惧中是不会想到钱的。如果有人把纸币留在火里,火就会把它烧成灰烬。所以我把我所能找到的钞票都拿走了。没有人会因为我拿走它们而变得更穷。”   “你不知道我是干什么的。”另一个说。   “你是干什么的?”   “我是警察。”   “噢!”第一个人喊了一声。他灵机一动,说:“那你知道我是干什么的?”“不知道。”警察说。   “我是个作家。我总是爱编一些从未发生过的.故事。”

英语小笑话带翻译短二:

Wife talking to her husband,who reads newspaper all day: I wish I were a newspaper so I'll be in your hands all day.

Husband: I wish that too, so I could change you daily

妻子和丈夫谈话,他一天到晚总是看报纸,妻子抱怨说:我要是报纸就好了,那样我就可以天天在你手里了。

丈夫说我也希望那样,那样我就可以每天换一个了。

NOTE

I wish I were ....是虚拟语气的说法,表示希望发生但不会发生的。

英语小笑话带翻译短三:

The Crowded Store

It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store's opening time, in front of the store.

A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curse. On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, and knocked around a bit, and then thrown at the end of the line again.

As he got up, he said to the person at the end of the line,” That does it! If they hit me one more time, I won't open the store!"

一天,一个商店降价大甩卖。人们在开店之前就排在了商店门前,排成了很长的一队。一个身材矮小的人推挤着想到队伍的前面,但被推了回来,而且被咒骂着插队。那个人又一次努力往前挤, 但是又被挤到了最后面,而且下巴被重重的碰了几下,他对最后一个人说:“如果他们再次这样对我,我就不去开商店门了!!!”

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