笑话哦本文目录一览：
- 1、英语笑话带翻译简短的
- 2、经典短篇英语笑话精选？
- 3、关于短篇英语笑话精选
- 4、英语短篇笑话
- 5、短篇英语笑话带翻译精选
英语笑话带翻译简短的
笑话是幽默的一个属概念 ,具有幽默的一切特征。笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。我整理了简短的英语笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!
简短的英语笑话带翻译篇一
When they’re together, my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem. one Saturday, I put my foot down. “All right, you two,” I said sternly. “No screaming , grabbing, whining, hitting, teasing, tattling, breaking toys, scratching or fighting.”
As I turned to leave, I heard my son say, “C’mon, Steven, let’s get dirty . ”
我五岁的儿子和他的表弟在一起的时候，总要招来大乱。一个星期六，我开始抗议了。“好啦，你们两个，”我严厉地说，“不许叫喊，不许乱拿，不许哭闹，不许乱敲，不许取笑，不许扯淡，不许弄坏玩具，不许乱抓，不许打架。” 我刚转身要走，就听我儿子说：“来，斯蒂文，我们来把自己弄脏吧。”
简短的英语笑话带翻译篇二
It’s Good to Admit a Fault
John is not a “good” student. He always sleeps in the class. Today he sleeps again.
“John!” Teacher says angrily.
“What? What’s wrong?” John is awaken.
“Why do you make a face? It’s classroom. Look! Everyone is laughing.” Teacher says.
“No one is laughing.” The others murmured.
“No, it’s not me. I was not making a face. I was sleeping.” John fells upset.
“Um. Not bad. You can admit your fault. You are still a good boy.” Teacher is satisfied with it.
认错
约翰并不是个“好”学生。他总是在上课的时候睡觉。今天他又睡着了。
“约翰!”老师生气地喊他。
“什么?出什么事了?”约翰醒了。
“你为什么要做鬼脸?这是教室!看看!同学们都在笑!”老师生气地说。
“没有人在笑呀。”其他同学笑声地嘀咕。
“不，不是我。我没有做鬼脸。刚才我睡着了。”约翰感到不安。
“嗯，还不错。你承认自己的错误，还是给好孩子”老师为此感到满意。
简短的英语笑话带翻译篇三
Mark is a good boy,but he is not very clean.His face and hands always very dirty.
One day,Mark goes to school.His teacher looks at him and says:"Mark,I know what you eat today.""What?"Mark asks. "Eggs.your face and your mouth tell me that."
"No."Mark says,"not today,but the day before yesterday."
翻译：马克是个好男孩，但他不是很干净。他的手和脸总是很脏。
一天，马克去学校。他的老师看着他，说：“我知道你今天早上吃了什么。”“什么?”马克问道。“鸡蛋。你的脸和嘴告诉了我。”“不，”马克说，“不是今天，是前天。”
经典短篇英语笑话精选？
笑话内含着丑与美的矛盾冲突,反映了严肃主题,充满平民大众朴素的审美理想。下面是我带来的短篇英语笑话，欢迎阅读!
短篇英语笑话精选
期末考试***中英***
Maxine, the platinum blonde, reported for her final examination which consisted of Yes/No answers. She took her seat in the examination hall, stared at the question paper, and then in a bit of inspiration, took a quarter out of her purse. She started tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet" Yes" for heads and "No" for tails. Within 30 minutes she was all done whereas the rest of the class was still sweating it out. During the last few minutes of the exam period，Maxine frantically started flipping the coin again.
麦西尼有一头银白色秀发，正在参加期末考试，试卷上的题目只有“对”和“不对”两种答案。她在考场里坐了下来开始答卷，这时她灵机一动，从钱包里拿出了一枚两角五分的硬币，往上抛硬币，出现正面就填“对”，反面就填“不对”。只用了30分钟的时间，她就做完了，而此时别的同学还在冥思苦想。但离考试完毕还有最后几分钟时，麦西尼又开始疯狂地抛硬币。
The moderator, concerned about what she was doing, stopped by her desk and asked if she was ok.
监考官对她的所作所为很好奇，便走到她的桌旁，问她是否有问题。
"Oh yes, I' m fine. I finished the exam a half hour ago一but,”explaining the frantic coin tossing, "I' m going back through and checking my answers!”
“我还好，半小时前我就答完了，现在我想从后往前的再检查一遍。”她这样解释抛硬币的原因。
短篇英语笑话阅读
金婚纪念日***中英***
A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town. A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.
一对夫妇正在庆祝他们的金婚纪念日，他们多年平静的生活，成为小镇上流传的佳话，一个小报记者要求采访他们这段长久而幸福的婚姻的秘密。
"Well，it dates back to our honeymoon,”explained the man. "We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom on the canyon by pack mule. We hadn’t gone too far when my wife's mule stumbled. My wife quietly said, ‘That's once' .We proceeded a little further and the mule stumbled again. Once more my wife quietly said, `That's twice.’We hadn't gone a half一mile when the mule stumbled the third time. My wife quietly removed a revolver from her pocket and shot the mule dead. I started to protest over her treatment of the mule when she looked at me and quietly said, `That's once'.”
“这要从我们的蜜月说起，”男的说，“我们去旅行了大峡谷，而且用骡子驮著行李走到了谷底，我们没有走多远，我妻子的骡子就跌倒了，妻子平静地说:‘这是一次’。我们继续走远了一些，骡子又跌倒了，我妻子又平静地说:‘这是第二次’。我们又走了不到半里，骡子第三次跌倒，我妻子从背包里拿出了***，射死了那头骡子。始想去阻止她这样对待那头骡子，可她看着我平静地说‘这是第一次”，。
短篇英语笑话学习
讣告***中英***
A man died and his wife phoned the newspaper to place an obituary. She called the obituary department and said, "This is what I want to print: Bernie is dead.” The man at the newspaper said, "But for $25 you are allowed to print six words.” The woman answered, "OK. Then print: Bernie is dead. Toyota for sale.”
一个男人死了，他的妻子给报社打电话要刊登一个讣告。她接通了负责刊登讣告的部门的电话说:“我想刊登这句话:博尼死了。”报社负责人说:"25美元您可以刊登6个字。”妻子想了想说:“好吧，那就这样登:博尼死了，本田车出售。”
短篇英语笑话欣赏
运气太差***中英***
Sadie's hu *** and Jake has been slipping in and out of a a for several months, yet his faithful wife stays by his bedside day and night.
莎迪的丈夫杰克已经昏迷好几个月了，他忠实的妻子不分昼夜地陪在他的床边。
one night, Jake es to and motions for her to e closer. He says, "My Sadie, you have been with me through all the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what, Sadie?"
一天晚上，杰克苏醒过来，示意他的妻子离近些，然后他说:“我的莎迪，你和我一起历经了多少的苦难呀，当我失业的时候，你在一旁支援我;当我生意失败的时候，你在一旁陪伴我;当我被打伤的时候，你在一旁陪伴我;当我们失去房产时，你在一旁陪伴我;当我生病的时候，你依旧在我的身边。你知道吗，莎迪?”
"What dear?" she asked gently.
“什么，亲爱的?”莎迪轻声地问。
"I think you're bad luck.”
“我觉得你的运气太差了。”
关于短篇英语笑话精选
笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。与此同时,笑话也是人们反对极权和专制制度的有力武器。我分享关于短篇 英语笑话 ，希望可以帮助大家!
关于短篇英语笑话：Work Smarter, Not Harder
A clergyman, walking down a country lane, sees a young farmer struggling to reload a cart that had lost its load of hay. "You look hot, my son," said the cleric. "Why don't you rest a moment and then I'll give you a hand?" "No, thanks," said the young boy. "My father wouldn't like it." "Don't be silly," the minister said. "Everyone is entitled to a break. Come, have a drink of water. Rest in the shade." Again the young man protested. "Oh, no, sir. My father would be real mad!" Losing his patience, the clergyman said, "Your father must be a real slave driver. Tell me where I can find him; I'll give him a piece of my mind!" The young farmer replied, "He's right there under that pile of hay!"
关于短篇英语笑话：Biggest Sex Life Lie
A minister passed a group of teenaged boys sitting on the church lawn. "Evening, boys. What are you doing?"
"Nothing much, Pastor," replied the one lad. "We're just seeing who can tell the biggest lie about his sex life."
"Boys, boys, boys!" intoned the minister. "I'm shocked. When I was your age, I never thought about sex at all."
The boys looked at each other and then said in unison, "You win, Pastor!"
关于短篇英语笑话：Catholic School
Little Tommy's parents had tried everything to help his math grade: tutors, flash cards, "Hooked on Math," special learning centers, everything. Finally, they enrolled him in the local Catholic school.
The very first day, he came home with a very serious look on his face, went straight to his room, and started studying. His mother was amazed. Books and paper were spread out everywhere and Little Tommy was hard at work. As soon as dinner was through, he marched right back up to his room without a word and studied some more. This went on for weeks until Little Tommy proudly brought home his report card and showed it to his parents:
An A in Math! "Tommy! This is great! I'm so proud of you! Son, what was it? What helped motivate you? Was it the nuns?" Little Tommy shook his head.
"Well, then, was it the books? The discipline? The structure? The uniforms? What?" Little Tommy looked at her and said, "Well, Mom, it's like this.
When I saw that guy out in the lobby nailed to a plus sign, I knew they weren't screwing around!"
关于短篇英语笑话：Throw It All Into A River
A preacher, completing a temperance sermon, spoke with great fervor! "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd throw it all into the river."
With greater emphasis, he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd throw it all into the river."
And finally he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd throw it all into the river, too!"
As he took his chair, the song leader stood and announced with a smile, "For our closinghymn, let us sing number 365:"
"Shall We Gather at the River."
关于短篇英语笑话：Fallen
An old priest got sick of everyone in his parish confessing adultery. During one Sunday's sermon he told them, "If one more person confesses to adultery, I'll quit!"
Since everyone liked him, they decided to use a code word: "fallen." From then on, anyone who had committed adultery said they had "fallen." This satisfied the old priest and the parishioners, and everything was fine for years, until finally the old priest passed away at the ripe old age of 93.
Shortly after the new young priest settled in, he paid a call on the mayor. The priest was quite concerned. "You have to do something about the sidewalks in this town, Mayor. You can't believe how many people come into the confessional talking about having fallen!" The mayor started to laugh, realizing that no one had explained their code word to the new priest.
But before the mayor could explain, the priest shook his finger at the mayor and said, "I don't know why you're laughing; your wife fell three times last week!"
英语短篇笑话
英语短篇笑话
看英语笑话，开心学习英语!
1、
Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!
Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!
Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.
布朗夫人：哦，
亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!
史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊!
布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。”
2、
The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled. His father knew it, but his grandma doted on(溺爱，宠爱) him. He hardly left her side. And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum(乱发脾气) . Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door. "Was school all right?" she asked, "Did you get along all right? Did you cry?""Cry?" John asked. "No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!"
六岁的约翰娇生惯养。他的父亲知道这一点，可他的祖父母仍然宠着他。这孩子几乎寸步不离他的祖母。他想要什么不是哭，就是闹。他第一天上学才离开祖母的.怀抱。约翰放学了，他奶奶在门口接他并问道：“学校怎么样?你过的好吗?哭了没有?”“哭?”约翰问，“不，我没哭，可老师哭了。”
3、
The patient is adamant. "Doc, I need a liver transplant, a kidney transplant, a heart transplant, a cornea transplant, a spleen transplant, a pancreas trans. . ." "What makes you think you need all these?" Well, replied the patient, "My boss said if I wanted to keep my job I needed to get reorganized."
这个病人显得很坚决。“医生，我需要做肝脏移植、肾脏移植、心脏移植、角膜移植、脾脏移植、胰腺移植和……” “你为什么认为你需要做这么多移植手术?”病人回答：“哦，是这样，我的老板说如果我这个人不重新组装的话，就别想保住我的工作!”
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短篇英语笑话带翻译精选
笑话是民间口头创作的一种体裁，它植根于20世纪初的俄罗斯语言文化中。下面是我带来的短篇英语笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!
Job Technique
Vacationing on the island of Oahu, we were waiting in our tour bus for some stragglers to show up. A man, obviously not with our group, approached the bus and was about to board. How would our driver handle the situation, we wondered. Straight-faced, he leaned toward the door and asked, "Going to the nudist Colony, sir?"
"Oh, no," replied the would-be passenger, retreating quickly.
"Works every time," the driver said with a wink.
Notes:
1 Oahu n.瓦胡岛
2 straggler n.落伍者;掉队者
3 show up显现
4 approach v.走近;接近
5 be about todo表计划即将做
6 board v.上船、火车、飞机、公共汽车等
7 straight-faced adj.板起面孔的
8 nudist Colony天体营裸体主义者实行其信条的场所
9 retreating quickly迅速后退。这是一个分词短语作状语，表示伴随状况。
Exercises:
根据短文填空：
① We were waiting in our tour bus for some _____ to show up.
② A man, obviously y not with our group, _____ the bus and was to board.
③ How would our driver _____the situation, we wondered.
④ He leaned _____the door.
⑤ "Oh, no, " replied the_____ passenger, _____quickly.
22.工作技巧
在瓦湖岛上度假时，我们坐在旅游车里等候掉队的人。一位男子，明显不是和我们一起的，朝旅游车走来并要上车。司机会怎么处理这种情况呢?我们都拭目以待。司机拉长了脸，向车门靠过去，问道：“先生，是去天体营吗?”
“哦，不，”刚想乘车的男子回答说，迅速转身而逃。
“每次都管用，”司机眨巴了一下眼睛说。
练习参考答案：
① stragglers ② approached;about ③ handle ④ toward ⑤would-be; retreating
短篇英语笑话带翻译阅读
A Bad Doctor
A man walked into a doctor's examining room.
"Put out your tongue," the doctor said.
The man put out his tongue and the doctor said.
"0. K. You can put your tongue back now. " the doctor said. "it's clear what's wrong with you . You need more exercise."
"But, doctor, " the man said. "I don't think--"
" Don't tell I me what you think, " the doctor said 揑 am the doctor, not you. I know what you need. I see hundreds of people like you. None of them get any exercise. They sit in offices all day and in front of the television in the evening. What you need is to walk quickly for at least 20 minutes a day. "
"Doctor, you don't understand," the patient said "I -"
"I don't want to hear any excuses, " the doctor said. "You must find time for exercise. If you don't, you will get fat and have health problems when you are older. "
"But I walk every clay," the patient said.
"Oh, yes, and I know what kind of walking that is. You walk a few feet to the train station from your house, a few more feet from the station to your office , and a few more feet from your office to a restaurant for lunch and back. That's not real walking. I'm talking about a walk in the park for twenty minutes every day. "
Please listen to me, doctor! " the patient shouted, getting angry with this doctor who thought he knew everything.
"I'm a mailman," the patient went on, "and I walk for seven hours every day. "
For a moment the doctor was silent, then he said quietly, "Put your tongue out again, will you?"
Notes:
1 examining room检查室
2 mailman n.邮递员
Exercises:
根据短文选择正确答案：
① The first thing the doctor asked the man to do was to_____ .
A. walk to work
B. exercise
C. show him his tongue
D. see hundreds of other patients
② The doctor would not_____ .
A. tell the patient what was wrong with him
B. let the patient speak
C. took at the man's tongue
D. let the patient watch television
③ The doctor told the man that he____ .
A. should get more exercise
B. should stop making excuses
C. should watch more television
D. was already too fat
④ The doctor_____ .
A. gave him good advice
B. walked seven hours a day
C. was really a mailman
D. was wrong
⑤ So we can know _____.
A. the man was very lazy
B. the man should do more exercise
C. the doctor was very kind to the patient
D. the man was not a good and careful doctor
23.庸医
一人走进一家诊所。
“伸出舌头，”医生说。
那人伸出舌头，医生很快地一下。
“好了，把舌头缩回去吧。”医生说，“你的病因很明显。你需要更多的运动。”
“但是，医生，”那人说，“我不认为----”
“不要告诉我你认为怎么样，”医生说，“我是医生，不是你。我知道你需要什么。我看过数以百计的你这样的病人。他们没有一个人锻炼过。他们整天坐在办公室里，晚上就坐在电视机前。你所需要的是每天至少快跑20分钟。”
“医生，你不知道，”病人说，“我----”
“我不想听任何理由。”医生说，“你应该抽出时间来运动。如果你不锻炼，那么当你老的时候，你就会变得很胖，并且有健康问题。”
“但我每天都走路的，”病人说。
“喔，是的。我知道那是一种怎样的散步。你走几英尺的路，从家到火车站，又走几英尺从车站到办公室，然后走几英尺从办公室到餐馆去吃中饭再回来。那不是真正的散步。我所说的是每天在公园里散步20分钟。”
“请听我说，医生!”病人叫起来，对那位自以为什么都知道的医生很生气。
“我是一名邮递员，”病人接着说，“我每天得走7小时的路。”
医生闷在那里半天无语。然后他轻声地说：“再把你的舌头伸出来，行吗?”
练习参考答案：
①C②B③A④D⑤D
短篇英语笑话带翻译学习
Saving Grace
Vacationing in Hawaii, my hu *** and and I went out to dinner one night at one of its finest restaurants - When presented with the check, my hu *** and reached into his pocket for his wallet, but somehow lost his balance and fell over. As the people at the next table looked on in astonishment 'he said, "The food was delicious-but wait till you get your bill!"
Notes:
1 Hawaii n.夏威夷岛
2 fall over落下;跌下
3 astonishment n.惊诧
Exercises:
根据短文回答下列问题：
① Where were the hu *** and and wife vacationing?
② Where did they go one night?
③ Did the hu *** and fall over before or after the meal?
④ How was the food there?
⑤ The hu *** and was mocking himself to save grace, wasn't he?
24.保全面子
在夏威夷度假时，一天晚上，丈夫和我去一家最好的饭店吃饭。当侍者拿来账单结账时，我丈夫把手伸进口袋掏钱包。但不知怎的，他失去了平衡，仰面摔倒了。在邻桌的人还在惊讶地望着他的时候，他说：“饭菜味道是很美----但也要等结了账再走呀。”
练习参考答案：
① In Hawaii ② One of the finest restaurants ③ After the meal
④ Delicious ⑤ Yes
