笑话哦本文目录一览：
英语幽默小故事《小男孩和老女人》
Lady First 女士优先
A teacher asked her class: "Is the sentence ' The ox and
the cow are in the fields' correct?" Most of the children said: "Yes, it is all
right!" And only one little boy said: "No, it is not correct. The lady must be
mentioned first."
女士优先
一位老师问班上的学生：”公牛和母牛在田里“这个句子对吗？” 大多数学生回答说：“对，一点不错。”
只有一个小男孩说：“不对，应该先说女士。”
儿童英语笑话故事阅读？
英语是一种交流的工具,口语交际能力的重要性不言而喻。故事英语教学法是一种创新性教学方法，它能提高学生的口语能力，培养学生用英语思维的能力，在表达、语音、语感等方面也起著突出的作用。我精心收集了儿童英语笑话故事，供大家欣赏学习!
儿童英语笑话故事篇1
George is a little monkey. He lives in a deep forest. He likes jumpingand climbing trees. He is happy every day. But he has a shorting. He is curious.
乔治是一只小猴子。他住在大森林里。他喜欢在树上跳来跳去，爬上爬下。他整天都乐呵呵的。但是他有个毛病，就是太好奇。
One day an old man goes by the forest. He carries a lot of straw hats. George sees the man, and the man sees George, too. The man says to himself, “What a lovely monkey! I will catch him. I will take him home.”
一天， 一个老人路过大森林，他带着许多草帽。乔治看见了这个老人，老人也看见他了。老人自言自语道：“多可爱的猴子啊!我要捉住他，把他带回家去。”
The man sits down and thinks over. George sees and also sits down.
老人坐下来。想着办法。乔治看见了，也坐下来。
The man has an idea. He puts a hat on his head, and puts other hats on the ground. Then hepretends to sleep.
不一会老人有个办法，他戴上一顶帽子，又把其他帽子放在地上，然后假装睡觉。
George is curious and looks at the hats. “I will be nice if I put a hat on my head.” George thinks. Then he climbs down from the tree, picks up a hat and puts it on. The hat is too big, and covers George’s eyes. George can’t see. And the man gets up at once, rushes out and catches him quickly.
乔治很好奇，看看帽子，心想：“要是我戴上一顶，肯定好看。”于是爬下树，捡起一顶帽子戴在头上。可是帽子太大了，遮住了他的眼睛了。那个老人一下站起来，冲过去，迅速地捉住乔治。
Poor George!
可怜的乔治啊!
儿童英语笑话故事篇2
There is a wolf. He is very hungry and has no strength to find food. As he lies under a large tree, a dog sees him. The dog sees the wolf is so thin and hungry, and he feels sorry for him and says, “You are soterrible! Are you hungry?”
有一只狼，他非常饿，而且饿得没有力气去找吃的了。当他躺在一棵大树下时，一只狗看见了他。看到狼又饿又瘦，狗挺可怜他的：“你看上去真可怕。你很饿啊?”
“Yes,” says the wolf, “I’m hungry because you are guarding the sheep. Now I am so weak that I can’t find food. I think I will do.”
“是的。”狼说，“我饿是因为你和你的伙伴看守着羊群。现在我弱得没法去找食物。我想我就快要死了。”
“Why not help me?” Asks the dog, “I work regularly and I eat regularly. You could do the same. You can help me guard the sleep. In that way, I will not worry about your stealing the sheep, and you will not worry about going hungry. It’s good for us.
“为什么不帮我呢?”狗说，“我们按时工作，准时吃饭。你也行的。你可以帮我看羊群。那样我就不用担心你会来偷羊，你也不用担心挨饿了。这对我们都有好处。”
The wolf thinks it over and thinks the dog is right. So they walk to the dog’s house. As they are walking, the wolf sees that only the hair of the dog’s neck is very thin. He is curiousabout this. So he asks the dog about it.
狼考虑了一下，觉得狗说的对，他们就一起朝狗的屋子走去了。正走着，狼看见口脖子上的毛很少。他觉得好奇，就问狗怎么回事。
“Oh, don’t worry about that,” says the dog, “It’s the place where the collar ties on the neck. My master chains me up at night.”
“啊，别担心，”狗说，“这是系狗项圈的地方，晚上主人会把我拴起来。”
“Chained up!” shouts the wolf, “Do you mean that you are chained up at night? If I e to live with you, will I be chained up at night, too?”
“拴起来?”狼叫起来，“你是说晚上你会拴起来?如果我去和你住，晚上也会被拴起来?”
“That’s night,” says the dog, “But, you’ll get used to it.”
“没错，”狗说，“但是你会习惯的。”
“But, if I am chained up, I won’t be free.” After saying this, the wolf turns round and runs away.
“但是，如果被拴起来，我就不自由了。”说完，狼转身跑了。
The dog shouts, “Wait! e back! I’m not free, but I’m healthy. I have good food, and a warm place to sleep. I like enjoying life. In fact, I’m freer than you are.”
狗大声喊道：“等等!回来!我是不自由，可是我很健康，我有好的食物，有个温暖的地方睡觉。你太喜欢享受生活了。我其实比你还自由些。”
儿童英语笑话故事篇3
Linda was a good girl, but she was often late for school.
琳达是一个好女孩，但她经常迟到。
One day, she was late again. When she came in, Mr. Clark, her teacher said angrily, “I’ll tell you father if you are late again.” Linda didn’t want him to do that. Because her father was very strictwith her.
一天， 琳达又迟到了。当她进来的时，她的老师克拉克先生生气说：“如果你在迟到， 我就通知你爸爸。”琳达不想他那么做，因为她爸爸对她要求很严格。
The next morning, Linda got up early. She hurried to school. At the school gate, she heard the first bell, “What shall I do?” she asked herself, “I’ll turn it in first.” She decided. And so she did.
二天， 琳达起床很早。她匆匆向学校走去，在学校大门口，她停下来了。因为地上有一个钱夹。当她站在那儿是，她听见了第一遍 *** ，“我该怎么办呢?”她自言自语，“我要先把它交上去。”她下定决定，于是她就是这么做了。
When she hurried into her classroom, Mr. Clack was already beginning his class.
当她匆匆走进教室的时候，克拉克先生已经开始讲课了。
“Linda! Didn’t I tell you to be here on time?” Mr. Clack said as he as her.
“琳达，我没有告诉你早点来吗?”克拉克先生一看到琳达就说，
“I’m sorry, sir,” Linda tried to explain, “I’m late because I had to…?”
“对不起，先生。”琳达想解释，“我迟到是因为我不得不……”
“I don’t listen to any excuse,” Mr. Clack stopped her. “If you can’t get here on time, I have to tell your father.”
“我不想听任何借口，“克拉克阻止道, “如果你不能准时到这儿，我不得不告诉你父亲。”
“But Mr. Clack. It’s …it’s unfair!”
“但是，克拉克先生，这是…..这是不公平的!”
“Unfair! How dare you say that?” Mr. Clack said angrily, “I’ll report you to theheadmaster.
“不公平!你怎么敢那么说!”克拉克先生愤怒的说，“我要把你的事情汇报给校长!”
“I was only trying to do a good idea,” Linda thought,“and now…” She couldn’t keep back her tears.
“我只想做一件好事，”琳达心想，“但是现在……”她的眼泪阻止不住流下来。
When the bell rang for the break, the door opened and Mr. White, the headmaster came in. he was holding a wallet in his hand, “Excuse me, Mr. Clack. Is this yourwallet?”
当下课 *** 响起是，教室的门开了，校长怀特先生走了进来。他的手里拿着一个钱夹：“打扰一下，克拉克先生，这是你的钱夹吗?”
“Oh,yes. It’s my wallet. Who found it? I must thank him.”
“哦，是我的。是谁找到的?我一定的谢谢她。”
“Linda found it and turned it in before school started.” Mr. White said.
“琳达发现的，并在上课前把它交来了。”怀特先生说。
Mr. Clack face slowly turned red. He looked at Linda and said, “I’m very sorry. Linda. I take back what I said.”
克拉克先生的脸渐渐红了，他看琳达，惭愧地说：“对不起，琳达，我收回我说过的话。”
“And I’m sorry. Mr. Clack. I’ll try not to be late again.” Linda said.
“我也不对，克拉克先生，我下次尽量不再迟到了。”琳达说。
经典英语笑话大全
下面是我整理的一些关于经典 英语笑话 7篇，欢迎大家阅读!
经典英语笑话一：咒语
An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years.
一个男人找到一个巫婆，要求她解开一条困扰了自己40年的咒语。
The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you."
巫婆说："或许我可以做的到，但你必须一字不落地告诉我下咒的时候说的那句咒语。"
The old man says without hesitation - "I now pronounce you man and wife."
男人毫不犹豫的答道：“‘我现在宣布你们成为夫妇。’”
经典英语笑话二：世界各地的蹩脚英语
①If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself。
日本旅馆：如果您想调节您房间的温度，请控制您自己。
②Please don't feed the animals. If you have any food, please give it to the guard on duty。
匈牙利动物园：请不要给动物喂食。如果您有食品，请喂给值班警卫。
③Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar。
挪威酒吧：女士们不要在酒吧里生孩子。
④Fur coats made for ladies from their skins。
瑞典皮货商店：为女士们制作的皮大衣，是用她们的皮制成的。
⑤Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists 。
香港牙科诊所：由最新的卫理公会教徒给您拔牙。
⑥Drop your trousers here for best results。
泰国的干洗店：在这里脱掉您的裤子，等待最好的结果。
⑦Specialist in women and other diseases。
意大利妇科诊所：我们是women和其他疾病的专家。
⑧Welcome to the cemetery where famous Russian artists are buried daily except Thursday。
俄国公墓：欢迎访问这个公墓，许多著名的俄国艺术家每天埋在这里，但星期四不埋。
⑨We take your bags and send them in all directions。
丹麦机场：我们将拿走您的行李，送往四面八方。
⑩The manager has personally passed all water served here。
墨西哥旅馆：旅馆经理将亲自为您撒尿。
经典英语笑话三：送出去还有的东西
What can Santa give away and still keep?
Answer: a cold.
什么东西圣诞老人可以分送出去，自己却也还留着?
答案：感冒。
经典英语笑话四：圣诞老人的 爱好
What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?
Answer: he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe.
圣诞老人喜欢在花园里做什么?
答案：锄地。(英文里Hoe 和ho同音。hoe是锄草之意，ho则是圣诞老人的笑声。)
铅笔
What do you do if one of Santa’s reindeer swallows your pencil?
Answer: use a pen.
若圣诞老人的驯鹿吃掉你的铅笔该怎么办?
答案：用原子笔
经典英语笑话五：1000元的脑筋急转弯
On Christmas Eve Santa Claus met an honest politician and a kind lawyer while riding up in an elevator of a very exclusive hotel.
Just before the doors opened the three of them noticed a 1000NT bill lying on the floor. Which one of them do you think picked it up?
圣诞节 前夕，圣诞老人和一清廉的政治人物，以及一心地善良的律师在一家高级饭店一同等电梯，门还未开前，三人同时看到地上有一张新台币1000元的钞票，猜猜谁会将它捡起?
Answer: Santa of course! Why? Because everybody knows that the other two don’t exist!
答案：当然是圣诞老人啦!为什么?因为大家都知道另外两者并不存在。
经典英语笑话六：Cry
"Tom, what's the matter with your brother?" asked the mother in the kitchen. "He's crying."
"Oh, nothing, Mum," replied Tom. "I'm eating my cake. He is crying because I won't give him any."
"But has he finished his own cake?"
"Yes." said Tom. "And he also cried when I was helping him finish that."
“汤姆，你弟弟怎么了?” 妈妈在厨房里问。“他在哭。”
“没事儿，妈妈，”汤姆答道。“我在吃我的 蛋糕 。他哭是因为我不给他吃。”
“他已经吃完自己的了么?”
“是的。”“我帮他吃完时，他也哭了。”
经典英语笑话七：可怜的男人
A man sat at a bar, had the saddest hangdog expression.
Bartender: "What's the matter? Are you having troubles with your wife?"
The man: "We had a fight, and she told me that she wasn't going to speak to me for a month."
Bartender: "That should make you happy."
The man: "No, the month is up today!"
一个男人坐在酒吧里，伤心至极。
酒吧招待：“你怎么了?跟老婆闹矛盾了?”
男人：“我们吵了一架，她说一个月都不跟我说话。”
酒吧招待：“那你应该高兴才是啊!”
男人：“不，今天是这个月的最后一天。”
要几个英语的笑话、谚语、小诗和绕口令
Morning
I love to wake to each new day,
And brush my dreams
Of night away,
And look out through
my window wide
To see what weather is outside,
And wonder what exciting thing
This shining, un-used day
Will bring.
清晨
我喜欢醒来迎接每一个清晨，
轻松抖落一夜的梦尘，
从窗口向外眺望远处，
广茅的天地是否晴空无云，
想象何等激动人心的事
这灿烂崭新的一天将献呈。
The music within
What is life?
It is in the colours of autumn,
A gentle snowfall in winter,
A sudden shower in spring,
The sunlight of a summer day.
It is in the laughter of the young and the old.
In people’s hopes,
In the nice blessings.
What is life?
It is joy, awareness,
And the music within.
心灵深处的音乐
生命是什么？
它浸染在绚烂的秋色里，
飘融在轻柔的冬雪中，
在阵阵春雨里，
在绚丽夏日中。
它包含在老人与孩子的笑声里，
它汹涌在人们的希望里，
它荡漾在美好的祝福中。
生命是什么？
是欢乐，是领悟，
是心灵深处的音乐。
A big black bug bit a big black bear and made the big black bear bleed blood.
Black background, brown background.
Fresh fried fish, Fish fresh fried, Fried fish fresh, Fish fried fresh.
The batter with the butter is the batter that is better!
Never trouble about trouble until trouble troubles you!
How much oil boil can a gum boil boil if a gum boil can boil oil?
A big black bug bit a big black bear, made the big black bear bleed blood
Once bitten, twice shy.一朝被蛇咬，十年怕井绳。
Pour water into a sieve.竹篮子打水一场空。
A fall into a pit, a gain in your wit. 吃一堑，长一智。
A fox may grow gray, but never good. 江山易改，本性难移。
A faithful friend is hard to find. 知音难觅。
Actions speak louder than words. 事实胜于雄辩。
“I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”
“Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”
“Yes ，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”
“对不起，夫人，为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。”
“20美元！为什么？不是说好只要4美元。”
“是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四个病人吓跑了。”
Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".
老师:为什么你每天早晨都迟到?
汤姆:每当我经过学校的拐角处,就看见一个牌子上写着"学校----
